Senior Moment – EILFM Review!

• Review of the 2021 Film “Senior Moment” featuring William Shatner, Jean Smart and Christopher Lloyd

and much, much more!

Crew Chief Brad: [00:00:00] Grand Touring Motorsports started as a social group of car enthusiasts, but we’ve expanded into all sorts of motorsports disciplines, and we want to share our stories with you. Years of racing, wrenching, and motorsports experience brings together a top notch collection of knowledge and information through our podcast, Brake Fix.

Crew Chief Eric: After drag racing his vintage convertible around Palm Springs, a retired NASA test pilot loses his license. Forced to take public transportation, he meets Caroline and learns to navigate love and life again.

Steve & Izzy: Does he, though?

Crew Chief Brad: Where did you get that dribble from? IMDb?

Crew Chief Eric: It makes this movie sound amazing, doesn’t it?

Just like the trailer. No.

Crew Chief Brad: I’m surprised you didn’t say his vintage Porsche though. We’re gonna get to that.

Steve & Izzy: That’s right. Hey everybody, I’m Steve and I’m busy and we’re with everything other from movies. . Thanks for having us.

Crew Chief Eric: Thanks for coming back. This is one of these movies that we [00:01:00] just couldn’t pass up.

It sounds like a recipe for success. And I think we asked ourselves how in the. Did we miss this gem?

Steve Kondrick: Well, of course we’re talking about 20, 20 one’s. Senior moment starring William Shatner. That’s right. What did we calculate? He was 87-year-old William Sha seven leaving yesterday. Yeah, he

Crew Chief Eric: was 90 years old when he filmed movie.

Oh, he’s nine. Oh,

Steve Kondrick: so he is 93 now.

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah,

Steve Kondrick: even more impressive to pull off. I think he says he’s 72 or whatever. And I’m like, wait, that math isn’t working out. That’s when we started like Googling. It’s the

Crew Chief Eric: Melissa Joan heart effect. She was 16 for two decades.

Steve Kondrick: You told us about this movie. That’s the only way I know it existed, honestly.

But looking into it is like, I don’t even know what this has to do with like, Oh, vintage convertible. Okay. Here we go.

Crew Chief Eric: Never forget. It’s got to have a car in it. Something special. And who do we have on board with us? Right? We’ve got Steve and Izzy from Everything I Love for Movies. And on our side, we’ve got Mount Mandan, not to be confused with Mount Mike.

That’s right. We got Tanya from the drive thru and Brad is back. Brad, [00:02:00] welcome back.

Crew Chief Brad: Thank you. Thank you.

Crew Chief Eric: We are talking about what movie, what is this epic William Shatner flick? Senior moment

Steve Kondrick: from 2021. Fresh out of the COVID.

Steve & Izzy: Yeah.

Steve Kondrick: From director Giorgio Serafini. 16? Oh, I’m glad you asked. 39 episodes of Orgoglio.

25 of Genta de Mare. 2011 movie starring Wesley Snipes called Game of Death. No, not the Bruce Lee one.

Izzy Fischer: Oh my.

Steve Kondrick: A 2014 movie starring Kung Li and Dolph Lundgren called Puncture Wounds. 200 degrees. Flashburn, Pegasus, colon, pony with a broken wing, The Tracker. The Tracker? Apparently it’s a 2019 movie starring Logan.

Oh,

Izzy Fischer: not Tracker.

Steve Kondrick: I, I didn’t look into it. Maybe it’s about an alien bounty hunter coming to Chicago.

Izzy Fischer: Not the Adrian Paul vehicle.

Steve Kondrick: That’s right. Or that new show that’s after the Super Bowl. This, and apparently it has four upcoming movies, but all of them have Italian titles, so we’ll see when they come out, I guess.

Crew Chief Eric: So what I got from that is, [00:03:00] none of these things are quite like the others, meaning the people in the movie that have a relationship to either William Shatner, Or Star Trek, or both. So, right out of left field.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, I was disappointed too. I was expecting Dolph Lundgren in the lead role. Can you imagine? In a slightly different movie.

Crew Chief Brad: He plays a pretty good old guy. But yeah, it would be more like on the Liam Neeson front than on the Shatner front. Less comedy and more killing.

Crew Chief Eric: I enjoy the comedic stylings of William Shatner. We’re gonna make references. to some of his other shows that he’s been on as we talk about this movie. But Stephen Izzi, who stars alongside of William Shatner in this movie?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, not a star in this guy, but they’re all in this movie.

Izzy Fischer: Everyone is in this. Yeah,

Steve Kondrick: we have Gene Smart as Carolyn, aka Love Interest. We have Sir Christopher Lloyd as Sal Spinelli.

Izzy Fischer: When did Christopher Lloyd, who did I say he was looking like? Christopher Lloyd has turned into the grandpa from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Yes, that’s what that is. [00:04:00]

Crew Chief Eric: Let’s make sure we get his character’s name right. Did you catch the full name of Sal?

Steve Kondrick: Sal Spinelli?

Crew Chief Eric: He is Giuseppe

Izzy Fischer: Salvatore

Crew Chief Eric: Spinelli.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, he should have been in the Lamborghini movie we did.

Crew Chief Eric: 100%! Also, we have Isai Morales. Do you know where Esai Morales? He’s most notable for a lot of things, but in the sci fi world, if we’re relating this to Shatner, do you know what he starred in?

Steve Kondrick: I don’t know, Babylon 5? I haven’t seen that.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh, no. I’ll give you a clue. The prequel to BSG.

Steve Kondrick: The prequel to Battlestar Galactica? Battlestar Galactica prequel?

Crew Chief Eric: Caprica? He was Bill Adama in Caprica. And the man hasn’t aged since

Steve Kondrick: he was a young Edward James almost in Caprica.

Crew Chief Eric: He was Edward James almost his dad.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, I fell off after like season five of BSG.

Crew Chief Eric: You fell off after it was over. All

Steve Kondrick: the spinoffs, like razor and Caprica came up. I’m like, nah, I’m good. Thanks though.

Crew Chief Brad: Eating the entire steak and then trying to return it. [00:05:00]

Steve Kondrick: Beth Littleford, Joe Estevez, everybody’s favorite Estevez. That’s all I really have written down.

Crew Chief Brad: I saw the Estevez guy, ’cause he was, he was on, on the bus sitting next to Chatter and he was part of his friend group, right?

Steve Kondrick: Mm-Hmm? .

Crew Chief Brad: I thought it was the dad. I thought it was Martin Sheen at first.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, it’s Martin Sheen’s

Crew Chief Brad: brother.

Crew Chief Eric: There is such a strong family resemblance between the Estevez’s and the sheen.

Yes. I mean, I said the same thing, almost like

Steve Kondrick: they’re from the same

Izzy Fischer: family. .

Crew Chief Eric: I know.

Crew Chief Brad: Are they related?

Steve Kondrick: It’s almost like they’re all really Estevez’s.

Izzy Fischer: It’s true though.

Crew Chief Eric: So do we know the relationship between Christopher Lloyd and William Shatner?

Steve Kondrick: They both traveled through time, obviously.

Izzy Fischer: I’m assuming they were lovers in the sixties.

Crew Chief Eric: Experimental. It’s better still. Tanya, do you know you’re a Trekkie? You should know this. She looks just as

Crew Chief Brad: confused as the rest of us.

Izzy Fischer: I’m not aware that Christopher Lloyd was ever in Star Trek.

Steve Kondrick: Was

Crew Chief Brad: he in one of the movies?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, cool. Are you referring to Star Trek 3, the search for Spock?

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah, he was one of the Klingons on the battle [00:06:00] cruisers.

Crew Chief Brad: Nobody would have guessed that. Nope,

Crew Chief Eric: not at

Crew Chief Brad: all.

Crew Chief Eric: There is an interesting relationship between Jean Smart and William Shatner, but it has nothing to do with Star Trek. Do you guys know how the two of them have worked together in the past?

Crew Chief Brad: Nerd alert.

Crew Chief Eric: It wasn’t on Designing Women. Or Frasier or any of the other shows that she’s been on.

Yeah.

Steve Kondrick: If it’s not Devil Rain, that’s the only other Shatner thing I know.

Izzy Fischer: Incubus? Were they in that together?

Crew Chief Eric: She was on four episodes of Shit My Dad Says, which starred William Shatner. I’ve never heard of

Izzy Fischer: that.

Crew Chief Eric: It was like a hot minute thing that fizzled out almost right away.

Steve Kondrick: It was the hot in Cleveland of its day.

Crew Chief Eric: Scraping the

Crew Chief Brad: depths of the internet for that one. I want to know where Henry Winkler was. Like, what was he doing that he was too busy to be in this amazing movie? Where, where is The Fonz.

Izzy Fischer: Fly fishing in Montana, I believe.

Crew Chief Brad: Amy Oakley. Got a Sandler movie. Yeah, probably. He said, screw you, Shatner. I’ve got Sandler now.

Crew Chief Eric: Is Harvey Keitel still around? I think he would have been good in this, too.

Steve Kondrick: He [00:07:00] doesn’t do bad movies. That’s, uh, Monkey Trouble starring Thora Birch. Yeah. See, Harvey Keitel’s a pimp. It’s gonna be great.

Crew Chief Eric: So we’re talking about the director. We’re talking about the cast. Did you guys catch the production company of this movie?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, are you afraid to chicken soup for the soul entertainment?

Crew Chief Eric: Yes! I didn’t even know that was the thing. What other movies are in their portfolio? They’re saving the world. Oh,

Izzy Fischer: I think they own Hallmark now.

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah. It wasn’t turn 10. No, it was not, but we’ll get to that too. And we’re going to go through this movie.

Crew Chief Brad: That’s the unfortunate part.

Crew Chief Eric: It’s one of those movies where the trailer gives you the whole movie in that three minutes. You begin to wonder why you’re watching the movie as it’s unfolding. And it’s unfortunate because careful editing in the trailer really draws you in to what it could be and the potential that it could have.

I will say I thought this movie was going to be a lot different than it turned out to be. And obviously we’ll decompose it as we, we’ll dissect it as we go along here. Again, I [00:08:00] went into this with super high hopes.

Steve Kondrick: Guys, I know you want to watch this. We’re really selling it to you. Don’t worry, it’s available on Tubi, Crackle, Flex, Redbox, all for free.

They will not accept your money. Amazon will, but Tubi and all these other noble services, they’ll let you watch it for free.

Crew Chief Eric: I’m ashamed to admit I pulled a Brad on this one. I spent the 3 to rent it on Vudu so that there would be no commercials. because I couldn’t do the Tubi thing again and make this thing like four hours long.

Steve Kondrick: Yes, Tubi’s not bad. Freebie’s the one that like will double the length of a movie.

Izzy Fischer: Oh my god, Freebie is unwatchable at this point.

Crew Chief Eric: 2. 99 to rent it on Vudu.

Izzy Fischer: Or

Steve Kondrick: free on Tubi. So yeah, after Chicken Soup for the Soul comes up and Steve can’t stop laughing, we see Shatner just hosing down his Porsche with some Mildly suggestive voiceover, and I’m like, what have you signed us up for by watching this movie?

Like, oh, you like that, don’t you, baby? Oh, get you nice and clean.

Crew Chief Brad: There wasn’t anything [00:09:00] mild about that voiceover. He was making love to that car.

Crew Chief Eric: The best part is I wrote down, nice chihuahua. What? I

Izzy Fischer: eat

Crew Chief Eric: chihuahua. Oh, so bad. Yeah.

Crew Chief Brad: You’re a dirty girl.

Crew Chief Eric: Beautiful card. We’ll talk more about that as we go along because they shot it at weird angles.

I was able to catch a glimpse of a couple of things and do some research and kind of dive into that and what its significance is and all this kind of stuff

Mountain Man Dan: is put on the car. So it’s victory, which I never really. Got the purpose of that through the movie, but

Steve Kondrick: So here’s the thing. They refer to him being like an award winning like famous race car driver from I assume the 60s?

That he was also like a NASA test pilot and like a bunch of other things? And I was waiting for him to throw out like Starship Federation Captain and shit too, but it’s like, oh, he’s done all these incredible things, cool. But you know, he’s just chilling in Palm Springs and has his like three buddies, Joe Estevez, Christopher Lloyd, and uh, Charlie [00:10:00] Grandpa,

Mountain Man Dan: that’s thing.

But I didn’t pick up on race car driving.

Crew Chief Eric: No, I didn’t either. And Tanya and I watched it together, and she knows I was taking copious notes while we were going through this.

Crew Chief Brad: I wanna know why he had a fancy Porsche 3 56 convertible parked under a carport

Crew Chief Eric: because it’s Palm Springs and it never rains.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah.

Yeah. But I, I don’t care. Like I, I’m gonna have that thing parked in a garage somewhere behind it. Offensive hedges. Or you would think NASA test pilot would be able to afford something a little nicer than my grandmother’s house.

Crew Chief Eric: That house in Palm Springs is two and a half million dollars. So let’s be real.

Okay.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. I mean, this is chicken soup for the soul money we’re dealing with here.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, true, true, true.

Steve Kondrick: You can’t rent out a Frank Lloyd Wright mansion or something.

Crew Chief Eric: So what I got from the license plate was First of all, his name is Major Victor Martin. That’s part of it. I’m wondering if maybe the name of his ship was Victory or Victory is obvious because he’s winning.

He’s got that sort of bravado about him where he’s like, I’m winning the world. Everybody knows me. He’s super popular. So it sort of made sense that his vanity plate said [00:11:00] Victory. I didn’t read too much more into it.

Mountain Man Dan: Yeah, I can get the old type mentality as to

Crew Chief Brad: why. I thought it was more an homage to Entourage and Johnny Chase.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, man, there were a couple of those shots where I’m like, wait a minute. This is like the great grandparents.

Crew Chief Brad: This is Johnny Chase. Johnny Drama. Yeah.

Steve Kondrick: Vincent Chase. Turtle.

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah. I mean, there is a little bit of that toxic masculinity running route this movie, which was surprising for basically a Hallmark film.

I related that victory vanity plate back to his personality. He’s winning. Everything is winning, which is actually ironic considering the plot of the movie as thin as it is. He’s losing every time he turns around and his world sort of falling apart. Izzy, this is where you psychoanalyze this stuff, right?

Crew Chief Brad: Does this film deserve that?

Izzy Fischer: Oh, shockingly, there was not a lot of character development here.

Crew Chief Brad: What is that? I never saw any of that in this movie. Can [00:12:00]

Crew Chief Eric: I watch a different movie than you guys?

Izzy Fischer: I don’t know. He’s an old retired guy with a car right now. He seems quite happy and then he does some dipshittery stuff and gets his license taken away because he’s being targeted.

Steve Kondrick: Then he drives dangerously, you know, because he’s like 90. I don’t know.

Crew Chief Brad: I feel like this is a PSA about targeting old people.

Steve Kondrick: I do love how like Beth Littleford is the Local lawyer or attorney. I don’t know exactly what, but she’s like, I’m cracking down on these old people driving around.

Mountain Man Dan: Yeah. The district.

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah. And I love that scene where she’s standing there. We’ll get to it during the driving test with the binoculars looking like the principal for Ferris Bueller.

Steve & Izzy: Why

Crew Chief Brad: is the DA targeting senior citizens? What the hell is wrong in Palm Springs that the DA has nothing better to do than target senior citizens driving poorly.

Mountain Man Dan: Yeah, I was imagining this story happening more in Florida since there’s large elderly population there.

Crew Chief Eric: They would have to change the title then it would be Florida Man.

Crew Chief Brad: It should have been called Florida Man anyway.

Steve Kondrick: So you may [00:13:00] be wondering, wait, why is he getting in trouble? Well, for example, beginning of the movie, he picks up his buddy, Christopher Lloyd, you know, Sal, whatever, and they go drive in.

And then, uh, some guy in an Impala on the hydraulics or whatever showing off. I don’t know. He makes some small theft auto joke that I’m like, All right, I assume that was a pause for laughter.

Crew Chief Eric: Okay, so you understood what he said because we were trying to figure it out a small what?

Steve Kondrick: Small

Izzy Fischer: theft

Steve Kondrick: auto. Yeah, the joke was what do you call a cholo in an Impala?

Small theft auto. And then it was like silent. It’s not funny. Okay, uh,

Crew Chief Eric: yeah, I didn’t get it either. I was like, what?

Crew Chief Brad: I’m not gonna go down that road. Yeah, right.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah So they test the manhood light turns green Rupee pills out of there and then yeah gets pulled over by the cops and

Crew Chief Eric: all right First of all, I’m gonna call flag on the play here I don’t know that there’s a 356, at least stock one, in history, that makes a whopping 44 horsepower, they could lay rubber like that on [00:14:00] the asphalt.

You dump the clutch.

Steve Kondrick: Oh no, he’s got a gen engine in there.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh, oh, okay. Off the victory spaceship. Yeah, got it. It’s LS

Mountain Man Dan: swapped. Were those cars posse or were they open diff in the rear?

Crew Chief Eric: Dude, 1955. We’re not talking about posse.

Mountain Man Dan: Dan’s nerding out. The funny thing is, if you actually look at it in the movie, it looks like they painted the tire marks.

It’s not even

Crew Chief Eric: 100%. 100%. Yeah, no, there’s no way. No,

Mountain Man Dan: it seems like a tire track, you know, there’s no actual spinning of the tire. So all I hear is Marissa

Crew Chief Brad: Tomei and my cousin Vinny with the paws attraction.

Crew Chief Eric: Beautiful car. I am trying to figure out which model 356 it is. And I’ll get to that as we go along here.

So she, when it gets impounded, we get a better view of what it is. Cause I noticed at first I thought it was a speedster, but it’s not anyway, we’ll get to that.

Crew Chief Brad: How many Impalas were used in the making or harmed in the making of this movie? Because every time they showed the Impala, it had a [00:15:00] different license plate.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh, you noticed that too? Well,

Steve Kondrick: that’s just to keep the cops off your tail.

Crew Chief Eric: It’s like the transporter where he’s got that button and they flip. He’s got

Crew Chief Brad: the flip, yeah.

Steve Kondrick: So yeah, I get pulled over by the cops and it’s like a friendly little lady cop who’s like, Victor, you can’t do this. You know, the DA is cracking down on you old folks doing this street racing shit.

And I’m like, what? No, stop it. And that’s when I was kind of hoping it was gonna be like a Fast and Furious, but starring, you know, William Shatner, Christopher Lloyd, Joe Estevez.

Crew Chief Brad: That would have been a better movie.

Steve Kondrick: Totally.

Crew Chief Eric: I was envisioning like a Ferris Bueller thing, you know, with the Ferrari flying over the hill going into Chicago and all that kind of stuff.

There could have been moments with this 356. Things could have happened. Shenanigans.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, you were expecting pure fuckery, and that’s not what this movie turned out to be. No, no, 100%. No.

Izzy Fischer: You know what? This car is in this movie about as much as Godzilla’s in the 2013 Godzilla.

Steve Kondrick: Well, did you guys at least catch the compliment that he [00:16:00] gave?

He talked about the lady cop’s posterior as she was walking away. Oh,

Izzy Fischer: Jesus.

Steve Kondrick: This

Izzy Fischer: is another one of those people.

Steve Kondrick: It’s like two hard boiled eggs doing the salsa.

Crew Chief Eric: What? Oh my god. I mean, again, every joke seemed to just completely DOA the minute it left.

Crew Chief Brad: Maybe we would have understood them better if we were also 80.

Izzy Fischer: Maybe.

Crew Chief Brad: 90. Maybe these are jokes from that generation.

Izzy Fischer: Look, we watched it with my 73 year old mother and she did not think they were funny.

Crew Chief Brad: Oh, well, she’s just

Crew Chief Eric: not cool.

Izzy Fischer: She’s super cool. Her favorite movie in the whole world is Boy and His Dog.

Crew Chief Eric: I mean, she’s the target demographic, Brad. 73 years

Izzy Fischer: old. I mean, she is the target demographic, Brad.

I

Crew Chief Brad: don’t think there is a target demographic for this movie. They just cast a wide net.

Crew Chief Eric: Alright, so we got this drag race. He gets pulled over by the Mayberry cops. And, you know, they let him off with a warning. And he just kind of takes off again like a bat out of hell.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. And he’s going to a calendar shoe at the airport with, I hope this model got paid [00:17:00] well, because as much as she’s in this movie or just lady in her twenties or whatever, but like William Shatner and Christopher Lloyd are just kind of there taking pictures with her and stuff.

Crew Chief Brad: She’s an actual actress. She’s not just a model. She’s was in a couple of TV series.

Crew Chief Eric: More importantly, my wife pointed out, this is another one of these moments where we can’t tell how old people are. She played the intern who was barely dressed. On 30 rock and how long ago was that?

Steve Kondrick: Okay. All right. Yeah. I know what you’re talking about.

All right.

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah.

Steve Kondrick: Good for her. So she got paid. Like I said, not a star in the sky. They’re all in this movie.

Crew Chief Eric: Speaking of stars in the sky. We meet another one here very soon, right?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, we go to the bar and we see Joe Estevez as one of his bar buddies.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh yeah. That, and then we keep going. They keep piling on.

We keep bringing people in.

Crew Chief Brad: I feel like Joe Estevez is like the Steven Baldwin.

Steve Kondrick: He’s the Daniel Baldwin.

Crew Chief Brad: He’s the Estevez that nobody knows. Like this is his only. He’s not anything else.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, Brad, you might want to look up Joe Estevez’s IMDb. He has been in like I

Crew Chief Brad: really don’t want to. [00:18:00] 500

Steve Kondrick: movies.

Crew Chief Eric: 500?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, absolutely.

Is he the

Crew Chief Brad: Kevin Bacon of the Estevez family?

Steve Kondrick: He’s more like

Crew Chief Brad: the, uh Serving coffee does not count as being in the movie.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, he pops in everywhere.

Crew Chief Brad: It doesn’t count if he’s cast by his father.

Izzy Fischer: No, moon. First off,

Steve Kondrick: Martin Sheen is his brother, not his father. Oh god, that makes it even worse. He’s Emilio’s dad.

Uncle. Uncle. That’s what it is. Uncle. He’s a

Crew Chief Brad: drunk uncle. Emilio

Steve Kondrick: and Charlie. Charlie. Arlo Sestavez. They’re brothers as president Cock.

Crew Chief Eric: This is gonna spiral into a debate about, are the sheen Sheens? Are they Esteves? Like, oh, they’re all

Izzy Fischer: esteves. They’re all esteves. Look, every sheen is an estevez, but not every estevez is a sheen.

Steve Kondrick: Michael

Izzy Fischer: Sheen is an Estevez. Yes.

Steve Kondrick: The guy from Good

Crew Chief Eric: Omens.

Izzy Fischer: Yes. The

Crew Chief Eric: guy from Toronto.

Izzy Fischer: Yeah.

Crew Chief Eric: Okay. Cause I have in a box, I put a box around it. Who is the captain? Do you remember the guy playing the piano in the bar? And I looked and I looked and I’m like, is that the captain from like captain and Tennille? Is it the [00:19:00] captain from the love boat?

You know, I don’t know. I looked on IMDB. He’s uncredited. So who is this guy? He

Steve Kondrick: kind of looked like Fred Willard, but I know it wasn’t him, but it was someone. So I was like, Oh, maybe he’s in one of those Christopher guest movies and I just don’t know their name. But there

Crew Chief Eric: was a moment where we went back to the bar for like no reason.

And again, the captain’s playing on his Casio keyboard.

Izzy Fischer: So the captain is dead

Crew Chief Eric: from captain and steel.

Izzy Fischer: Daryl dragon died in 2019. His

Steve Kondrick: name was Daryl dragon. Captain dragon,

Izzy Fischer: captain dragon. Really?

Steve Kondrick: So that was the guy in the movie.

Izzy Fischer: No, the movie was made 20. Something else, right? He died in

Steve Kondrick: 1984 or something.

Izzy Fischer: It

Steve Kondrick: was his

Mountain Man Dan: ghost.

What had to have been filmed in like 2019, because one of the other characters, the guy that was on The Rascal, the old guy that lost his Cadillac, he died in 2020 as well.

Crew Chief Eric: That guy has a credit. His name is like Ted Wallace in IMDb. But the captain at the bar doesn’t have a credit? I don’t get it.

Crew Chief Brad: How rude is it that he’s playing piano?

He’s undercredited.

Izzy Fischer: The captain at the bar had his name removed from [00:20:00] this movie. He thinks he’s Her rear is going places and he doesn’t need this bringing him down. Please respect his privacy.

Steve Kondrick: His name was Sidney Sweeney.

Crew Chief Brad: Oh god. All right.

Steve Kondrick: Hey, what the hell happens? Um, oh, that’s right. He invites the model, like, meet up at the bar or whatever too, and she shows up and I’m like, get the fuck out of here.

Crew Chief Brad: No, no way.

Steve Kondrick: Okay, so they’re at the bar and then, like, The, I don’t know, the owner of the bar or whatever is like, uh, I want to dedicate this next bit to a huge blah, blah, blah, blah. Basically, I was so scared Shatner was about to do one of his spoken word musical numbers when he was called up to stage.

Crew Chief Eric: This movie could have been Shatner’s version.

Of my name is Bruce little tidbits from everything he’s ever done. Can you imagine him standing up there doing the anchorman flaming flute and singing rocket man? I mean,

Steve & Izzy: Come

Izzy Fischer: on,

Steve & Izzy: dude, that would have been a space cowboy, but you weren’t ready for that,

Steve Kondrick: but that doesn’t happen. He just kind of goes up and says, Hey, thanks.

Great to be here. I love this bar. [00:21:00] Woo. And then sits back down. I’m like, boo, we want rocket man.

Crew Chief Brad: It reminded me of I’m Commander Shepard and this is my favorite store on the Citadel.

Crew Chief Eric: I know exactly what you’re talking about. Oh, that’s some video game nerd right there. It’s deep.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. So we cut tonight again.

He’s driving home. Oh, look, it’s the guy in the Impala again. I don’t know. Calls him a dipshit. And I’m like, well, that’s uncalled for.

Crew Chief Eric: I laughed at that because William Shatner saying that word. I don’t know. is funny. Think about it.

Steve Kondrick: Dipshit. Dipshit. It’s like they would make an entire show called dumb shit my dad says or whatever you said earlier.

Crew Chief Eric: But then I have these fantasies of him being on the Enterprise and turning to bones and calling him a dipshit. Like, how cool would that have been? Things you wish happened back in the day.

Crew Chief Brad: Star Trek would have been a lot better if you did that.

Crew Chief Eric: So what do you [00:22:00] call a Vulcan driving an Impala?

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. So, yeah, they.

race. He spins out and damn near takes out like an entire restaurant. That’s right. It’s the cuckoo cafe or whatever. As soon

Izzy Fischer: as they start racing, Steve’s like, and they take out a farmer’s market.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, right. The farmer’s market. Why are there so many kids in the school right now? We have

Crew Chief Eric: Palm Springs confused with Florida.

Yeah, where were all

Steve Kondrick: the children? Right? Florida Man’s going

Crew Chief Brad: to be the sequel. The

Mountain Man Dan: whole spin out when they’re racing, the first thing came to my mind. Was the way they painted the Corvair back in the

Crew Chief Eric: day. Yeah, no, Tanya is 100 percent right. The first question was, how? Again, this car has like 44 horsepower.

It

Crew Chief Brad: also

Steve Kondrick: weighs like 300 pounds.

Crew Chief Brad: When he first makes the turn, you can see the car is stopping. And then all of a sudden they’re spinning.

Steve Kondrick: I just love

Crew Chief Eric: the hands off the wheel.

Steve Kondrick: Everybody’s screaming at everybody. When the hands are off the wheel and stuff, I’m like, well, maybe that district attorney has a point.

Izzy Fischer: Right? Yeah, it’s like, [00:23:00] Jesus take the wheel a little bit?

Steve Kondrick: So then we cut to the trial and he’s like, Yeah, I’m just gonna represent myself. Everybody loves me around here. I’m gonna call my buddy to the stand and that’ll be a good character witness. We got like a five minute scene of him like, recapping how they met square dancing class back in 19 diggity two.

With

Izzy Fischer: Denny

Steve Kondrick: Crane.

Crew Chief Eric: The whole time I’m like, Denny Crane. Jenny Crane. This was the Boston legal scene. This was the moment for James Spader. Oh, shit. Yes. We’re spader to

Izzy Fischer: come out as opposing counsel. Yes. Where is James Spader? Oh,

Steve Kondrick: Spader was cracking down on Old Fogies.

Crew Chief Brad: again. This could’ve been amazing. That would’ve made a lot more sense.

Izzy Fischer: He’s too weird for this movie. .

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, there’ve been different. Weird sexual energy, like, oh yeah. Gene Smart’s. Definitely Banging. James Spader. Yeah. Oh yeah. Andy Sy Morales.

Crew Chief Eric: Well, that was confusing too. All right. So he goes to court. We have our Denny Crane moment, a little Boston legal nod there. I was really expecting just amazingness to [00:24:00] happen here and let down.

Steve Kondrick: Cause then, yeah, they just pulled the video and like, is that you driving that car with your hands in the back seat? And

Mountain Man Dan: like, uh, the judge wants him to decide to take his license. But the thing about for me is the fact they impound his car and won’t let him get his car back just because he doesn’t have his license.

I’ve never heard of that

Crew Chief Brad: anywhere before. It didn’t seem like any of his friends had their license either. So nobody could drive it.

Crew Chief Eric: The only guy that had a license in this was the dude on that mobility.

Mountain Man Dan: Well, it says that’s why he was on the mobility scooter.

Crew Chief Eric: We’ll get back to that too.

Mountain Man Dan: Cadillac. Remember?

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Steve Kondrick: They revoke his license and apparently repo his car, which seems unnecessary. It’s a little

Izzy Fischer: extreme, but they’re like, Hey,

Steve Kondrick: you can retest in 30 days or something, if you.

Izzy Fischer: But I don’t think they can hold his property unless he like killed someone.

Crew Chief Eric: Right. So who’s the resident lawyer on the call?

I’ve only played one on tv. Dan, you know the laws , . Not

Mountain Man Dan: in California, apparently. .

Crew Chief Eric: So this courtroom scene is [00:25:00] also where Christopher Lloyd gets a big chunk of acting time. Let’s just say we learn his real. Giuseppe Salvatore Spinelli and all that but to your point from before where you said he reminded you of Charlie from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory’s uncle This is where I went.

Oh my god, Christopher Lloyd is reprising his role from taxi He was almost exactly the same character and I was expecting him to do like the whole bit Like have you ever seen the old taxi episode where they’re taking the driving test? Especially because this movie has a driving test in it What does the yellow light mean?

Slow down. What does right. You know, that whole bit that they didn’t taxi. So like, that’s who I saw when I looked at, I was like, Oh my God, it’s like the self fulfilling prophecy.

Steve Kondrick: Nope. Just Shannon. Oh, but we’re also introduced rock Kendall Brock. Oh, was it B rock? It’s rock. B rock. I thought it was just rock.

And I’m like, that’s just wrong.

Mountain Man Dan: According to IMDB, it’s R O C K. There’s no B.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, all right then. Brock the rock. That’s

Crew Chief Eric: [00:26:00] even worse.

Steve Kondrick: But he like offers his car like, Hey, I came to help you get your license back, blah, blah, blah.

Crew Chief Eric: But there’s a great line here because B rock Kendall is telling him about how he’s got this whole plan.

I can get you your car back and you’ll pass the test in 30 days and I can train you and this and that. And Shatner says, I wrote this down cause I thought it was one of the best quotes. Cheap suit, white sneakers. Who dresses like that? I don’t trust him as far as I can spit. All right. That’s funny. I’m good with that.

You know, a little bit of humor there.

Mountain Man Dan: Thing was how he handed Shatner his business card. It’s like he was transitioning drugs over to it.

Crew Chief Brad: Oh my God. I thought it was better called Saul.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. Yeah. The little weird handshake. Keep it down. Keep it down. I can’t see that have the DAC in this, you know, he has to like start taking taxis, but of course taxis are 40 bucks.

Crew Chief Eric: Now we’re taking taxis home. We do see the mobility scooter guy. Which then I asked the question to my wife, I said, Is there a point in your life that you let your eyebrows get that big? Like, I don’t understand! Everybody else is like, well coiffed and well groomed for as old as And this guy was like, tarantula eyebrows.

Steve Kondrick: [00:27:00] Maybe it was the breeze of the open road in a drop top car, and now that he no longer has it, doesn’t maintain his brow

Crew Chief Eric: length. They were majestic, but also scary at the same

Izzy Fischer: time. You know it’s a really good movie, folks, when you’re Fixating on people’s eyebrows.

Steve Kondrick: All right, so we cut to a bar. Here we go.

And Shatner’s with this model chick. Never got her name. Sorry, I always have her as model in there. Basically, I said, why do you chase younger girls? And I’m like, is that a real question? Oh, because they’re so beautiful. And I’m like, you’re almost be her great grandfather, sir.

Crew Chief Eric: You don’t know. You gotta, you gotta stretch it out.

Crew Chief Brad: I wanna know why she’s chasing older men. Not older men, like geriatric men. Turn that question around.

Steve Kondrick: Not chasing, just leading him on.

Crew Chief Brad: Well, I don’t know, he had

Mountain Man Dan: his little blue pill. He was ready. You know, I remember Anna Nicole Smith did this in the 90s. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, say, he is pretty loaded. How did that work out for her?

Izzy Fischer: I 100 percent thought she was gonna bring [00:28:00] him to, uh, like a pig party. And

Crew Chief Eric: this is what made me think. Yeah. Yeah. That Shatner was like loaded in this movie, which we sort of kind of find out later that he’s not. Hey, let’s make pretend.

Izzy Fischer: He’s not hurting. Right. Yeah. He’s definitely.

Steve Kondrick: He’s getting Star Trek residuals.

Izzy Fischer: He’s making it appear that he’s a lot more loaded than he is. Like he’s not in like deep debt, but he’s not dropping 10 grand on a tortoise picture.

Crew Chief Brad: Yes,

Crew Chief Eric: that

Crew Chief Brad: was, that was awesome. Well, that’s just because he’s frugal. Yeah,

Steve Kondrick: he’s wise.

Crew Chief Brad: But I

Crew Chief Eric: think it might be the allegory of the license plate. It’s that victory, right?

Victory! Making himself look bigger than he is.

Steve Kondrick: Wait a minute, who wrote this movie? Eric, what the hell? Ha ha ha ha! It’s an allegory! Listen to me! I know what I’m talking about! When I was in school, so then, basically she’s like, hey, you wanna come to a pool party with me? And of course Shatner’s like, M90, let’s do this.

The weirdest thing about this scene was when they show up and they see, like, the two girls kissing and Shatner’s just, like, [00:29:00] touching them. I don’t know if he was trying to separate, like, a couple of dogs that shouldn’t be mingling or what, but he was like, don’t, don’t touch them.

Mountain Man Dan: He seemed all mesmerized like he’d never seen it before.

It was so awkward. It was so

Crew Chief Eric: cringey.

Crew Chief Brad: I love how nobody batted an eye that Their great great great grandfather was there at the party.

Steve Kondrick: To be fair, it was a pool party in Palm Springs.

Crew Chief Brad: You all bring this up like it’s something I should know. I don’t know anything about Palm Springs.

Steve Kondrick: Palm Springs is where old people go when they’re old.

Go to die? To be anywhere else.

Izzy Fischer: It’s the West

Crew Chief Eric: Coast, Florida. Here’s the thing with Deceit. To Brad’s point, he’s the only octogenarian. At the pool party, I expected to see the Estevezes, Christopher Lloyd, Robert Duvall. I mean, you got to bring them all out for this pool party because it’s your point, it’s Palm Springs, but then it turns into Cocoon.

Remember the pool scene in Cocoon?

Steve Kondrick: That’d be an interesting twist. I’m not going to lie, but instead it cuts to the next morning and he’s taking his driving test. [00:30:00] He kills absolutely everything on the track.

Izzy Fischer: Yeah, murder.

Crew Chief Brad: What happened with him and the model? This is a whole part of the plot that nobody knows.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, I’m sorry. They dove into the pool and then time jumped. Yes. No, I

Crew Chief Brad: know. Yada, yada, yada.

Steve Kondrick: And then he never called her again. Do we see her again? No. No, because

Izzy Fischer: he never called her again.

Steve Kondrick: She went back to her home planet. What

Crew Chief Brad: a jackass.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh my God, the driving test. That was a good scene. I laughed at that. I love that part where when he hits the first thing and he’s driving that Camry, which is beat to hell and back, he’s like car handles like a goddamn tank.

And then he hits the next thing.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, son was in my eyes and shit like that. And I’m like, you know what? You’re convincing me. Maybe you don’t need your license.

Izzy Fischer: I

Crew Chief Brad: love the part where he’s like, do you think I killed him? The woman? I don’t know. Definitely the little kid.

Crew Chief Eric: It was so good. That scene was so good.

That was well done.

Steve Kondrick: And then here’s the best part about it. You expect after he like runs over [00:31:00] everything and then it shows them like getting up, getting out of the car or whatever. And you expect like the instructor or whatever would be like, I’m sorry, you don’t pass. You’ll have to come back and blah, blah, blah.

There’s no scene of that. It’s basically just the driving test, him sucking at it. And then it’s him walking to the grocery store or whatever. And I’m like, So, I’m assuming he didn’t fail.

Izzy Fischer: No! He went up to the counter, and the guy handed him the piece of paper, and then he was sad.

Crew Chief Eric: Because he failed the written test and the driving test.

Izzy Fischer: That’s right, that’s right. There was this scene where, uh, they were like, Oh, little Joey!

Steve Kondrick: That’s right, okay. Uh,

Izzy Fischer: you got the best score of the day! Yeah, the

Steve Kondrick: only perfect score! Okay, they hand it to him. His regular face, I guess, looked like sad face, because he was just staring at the paper. And then it cuts to him walking into the grocery store, and I’m like, So did he fail the written too?

Like, does he really not know how to drive?

Crew Chief Brad: The rules were different 70 years ago when he learned. That’s true. They had buggy whips too.

Steve Kondrick: Back in the time before 8 Tracks.

Izzy Fischer: In the before full time.

Steve Kondrick: Uh, yeah, so he goes to the grocery store, puts his head in the [00:32:00] freezer, and, like, gets caught doing it. Like, What are you doing?

Like, uh, just grabbing a beer. I’m like, not in that ice cream thing, you’re not.

Crew Chief Eric: Well, wasn’t that our first glimpse of Jean Smart?

Steve Kondrick: Okay, that

Izzy Fischer: was her? Okay,

Steve Kondrick: okay.

Izzy Fischer: No.

Crew Chief Brad: That wasn’t the first.

Izzy Fischer: Not our first glimpse because we saw her go into her cafe. Yeah, painting or whatever. And she went there when he went spinning out of control.

Crew Chief Brad: That was his first glimpse.

Mountain Man Dan: Well, even before then, they did a little side segment, but when he was on his way to get the photography done with the Porsche, she’s there with her friend that’s the artist doing the painting. That was the first time you see her, I believe.

Izzy Fischer: And when they originally said, your license is revoked, What am I supposed to do?

And he said, they said, take the bus. He’s like, I don’t take the bus. We got a little glimpse of her on the bus.

Steve Kondrick: And she was also at the scene of the crime

Crew Chief Eric: chronologically. That is all correct. What I meant by glimpses, Shatner gets his first glimpse of her. That’s the first time they’re together.

Izzy Fischer: Interaction. Yes. I’ll buy that. Good recovery.

Steve Kondrick: Linetto. He sees someone like driving his car when [00:33:00] he’s walking back home. It’s like, wait, what the hell? So then he like hops on the bus, sits down next to Jean Smart and yeah, his bag tears and she’s like, Oh, it’s okay. I got one of the cloth ones here. I always bring extras.

But then she starts judging his honey buns. I don’t care what you say. Honey buns are great.

Izzy Fischer: Honey buns are literally like prison money. They’re fantastic.

Steve Kondrick: Wait, what?

Izzy Fischer: No, they trade them in prison. Like, personally, like, Honey Buns are worth more than cigarettes. I

Steve Kondrick: thought you were saying prison money was fantastic.

That’s what I thought you were saying. She

Crew Chief Brad: speaks like an authority.

Izzy Fischer: No, Honey Buns are so fantastic. Honey Buns

Crew Chief Brad: and cigarettes. I feel like we need to unpack this.

Steve Kondrick: Also, I think Honey Buns is also prison code.

Crew Chief Brad: Hey, Honey Buns. That’s my nickname.

Crew Chief Eric: What’s delightful about this particular scene is that the writers felt that Jean Smart What she needed to do was just read the ingredients off the little Debbie box.

It’s like, wow, that’s some writing right there. I mean, that is like Oscar award winning

Steve Kondrick: potassium

Izzy Fischer: Benzoate. Hmm. That

Steve Kondrick: still sounds

Izzy Fischer: delicious. [00:34:00] Jean smart is so much better than this movie. Jean is not the problem with this movie. 100%. She is not the problem with this movie. Uh,

Steve Kondrick: Her character may have, uh.

Izzy Fischer: She as an actress is not the problem.

No,

Steve Kondrick: no, no, not at all.

Izzy Fischer: Her, she is not responsible for the writing. She did the best with what she was given.

Crew Chief Brad: Little Debbie was responsible for the writing.

Mountain Man Dan: Her rating of it, I took that as a fact, because earlier when it shows her in her little cafe or whatever, it seems like she does a lot of natural ingredients, and that’s why when the one customer asked for something and her daughter was saying, She was like, well, all out of the ingredients.

She’s like, so we can’t make them, but that’s how I took that. And that’s why she was kind of judging it.

Izzy Fischer: She’s a baker. She’s judging pre packaged baked goods.

Crew Chief Eric: And here’s a bit of real life irony. A little bit of trivia, just mildly amusing. She’s. In charge of the cuckoo cafe. She’s a baker, you know, she’s making fun of the honey buns.

Come try mine. Blah, blah, blah. You know, I’m starting to salivate after she’s reading about, you know, monosodium glutamate and all this other stuff that’s in these [00:35:00] things in real life, Jean smart as a diabetic lifelong. Like, so I thought it was sort of ironic that she’s playing this character called acting.

Yes. It’s an allegory anyway, a little bit of trivia there.

Steve Kondrick: So yeah. So Chattner drinks a bit. And then he has this nightmare of, like, him and his buddies riding scooters and just wrecking the DMV, and I’m like, yeah, we’ve all been there. That’s

Mountain Man Dan: my favorite part of the whole movie.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, exactly. They were, like, a roaming scooter gang or whatever, and doing crimes at government agencies.

Mountain Man Dan: I thought it was bumper. Bumper cars are rascals.

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah, I didn’t realize it was in the DMV, because I thought it was like in an old folks home or something. Wait,

Izzy Fischer: you didn’t realize it was the DMV? I didn’t

Crew Chief Eric: realize that.

Izzy Fischer: Oh my gosh, that’s why it was funny.

Mountain Man Dan: You didn’t notice that?

Crew Chief Eric: No.

Steve Kondrick: Part of the whole movie.

You just thought it was a bunch of chairs in a whitewalled facility. It was

Crew Chief Eric: the wood paneling that reminded me of the auxiliary trailers we had in our high school. Like it [00:36:00] was just bringing back flashbacks. Just you

Steve Kondrick: didn’t notice they only accepted checks,

Crew Chief Eric: money,

Steve Kondrick: orders, money, grim, goddamn DMV,

Crew Chief Eric: DMV, the post office, whatever,

Steve Kondrick: all the seating there at

Crew Chief Brad: the post office.

I love the post office tie in.

Crew Chief Eric: This is the point when my wife turns to me and says, Is there a plot to this movie?

Crew Chief Brad: No. I thought she would have said, Can we turn this off?

Crew Chief Eric: We’re maybe like 20 minutes into the movie at this point. Yeah, we’re like

Steve Kondrick: a third of the way through the movie.

Crew Chief Eric: Here’s what kills me.

Everything is presented as little vignettes, right? It’s just sort of stitched together. It doesn’t have a flow or a rhythm. And that’s where I think she was like, What’s the plot here? Because it’s the little dream sequence. It’s the scooter sequence. They’re on the And then I know movies are cut up like that.

Yeah. But this one was exceptionally short and there was no tie back. Everything felt a little rushed. Even the court scene was like, and move on.

Crew Chief Brad: Eric, I feel like you’re asking for like a Lord of the Rings four and a half hour director’s cut to tie all these different plots together. Maybe

Mountain Man Dan: he needs to [00:37:00] search for the director’s cut of this movie.

No, I think the second opinion,

Steve Kondrick: but if he and McKellen was working at the DMV, it

Crew Chief Eric: was like, that would have been amazing. Where’s Patrick Stewart?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, I don’t think him and Shannar talked to each other. They’re like David Lee Roth and Sammy Hagar. Yeah.

Crew Chief Eric: Ever since that generations movie. No more. They don’t talk like we’re done

Steve Kondrick: now.

I’ll bring in Malcolm McDowell instead. Where’s Chris Pine? So from here, he meets up with, uh, Rock Kendall and he’s, uh, you know, Rock’s like, yeah, for 799, I’ll train you so you can pass your test. And I’m like, this is going to be great.

Crew Chief Brad: Was he a lawyer? Was he like a better call Saul? Or was just, he just like a bluebird driving instructor?

Yes. I think

Steve Kondrick: he’s both. I think he’s an ambulance chasing. I can help you guys get your medical waivers and all that. Like he says. But I don’t have any conditions. Like how old are you? 72. Yeah. That’s a medical condition. Dude. That was such a

Crew Chief Eric: great line. That was so awesome.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. He knows all the loopholes and stuff.

Crew Chief Eric: He is one of those. Have you suffered from mesothelioma [00:38:00] lawyers? Right.

Izzy Fischer: 100%. 100 percent

Mountain Man Dan: consistent through the whole movie. It never says a single word.

Crew Chief Eric: It was like a pen and teller thing, right? If they say a word, you got to pay them. Did you notice that B rock? Sort of look like Penn Jillette too, like his whole get up.

I was just like, Oh, okay. And then was sort of trying to be an inspirational, motivational kind of speaker. And he’s like, it’s not just a license to drive. It’s a license to live. Yeah. That’s exactly

Izzy Fischer: how you see somebody like that. Try to act

Steve Kondrick: but then it’s like them like tossing darts at the cutout the district of turning and playing video games and shit

Crew Chief Brad: Did we skip the part where the part of the driving construction?

Was forza Yeah,

Steve Kondrick: yeah the video

Crew Chief Brad: games yeah,

Crew Chief Eric: but it was specifically long beach Yes,

Crew Chief Brad: it

Crew Chief Eric: was

Crew Chief Brad: the long beach track in the 356. It was so great. That was amazing That’s

Crew Chief Eric: when I knew brad was really paying attention to the film because I get a text. He’s like, oh my god They’re playing forza

Crew Chief Brad: I’m going to teach my [00:39:00] grandmother to drive on Forza.

Steve Kondrick: Correcting all my notes from GT to Forza. Okay.

Mountain Man Dan: I liked when he was in Brock’s office and his way to test Shatner’s reflexes was throwing the tennis ball at him.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh my god. Oh,

Mountain Man Dan: he’s If you could dodge a

Crew Chief Brad: wrench, you could dodge a ball.

Crew Chief Eric: And the basketball scene could have been completely deleted from the movie.

Like it had no point whatsoever.

Crew Chief Brad: The whole movie could have been deleted from the movie.

Izzy Fischer: They just wanted to prove the old people are still kicking it.

Crew Chief Eric: God, the magic of watching it on Tubi would have been amazing because that’s the moment they could have broken for commercial and done that T Mobile Charles Barkley.

I knew he was going to pick me on the little kids basketball team.

Crew Chief Brad: I would have loved to watch it on one of those paid advertisement services. And then every commercial was a Priceline commercial with Shatner in

Izzy Fischer: it. No, no, every commercial is the Dauntless

Steve Kondrick: soap and hymns and, which does kind of tie with this movie a little bit.

Izzy Fischer: I just [00:40:00] watched those. I’ve only seen that 10, 000 times now. Target marketing, people. Target marketing.

Crew Chief Eric: This is also where he plays the memory game for the first time as well, right?

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, poolside with ladies in bikinis walking by like, No, you can’t be distracted. You gotta focus and blah, blah, blah. And I’m like, Is that what the goal is here?

Okay. All right, and then I started like working on my head like okay, he’s paying 7. 99 for this. I’m wondering how much uh, Rock is paying those girls as for like 30 days.

Crew Chief Brad: He’s losing money. Was it 799 or 7. 99 because I think both prices are overpriced.

Steve Kondrick: After the first set of training montage or whatever, I guess Shatner decides he’s gonna go to this cuckoo cafe that he’s never been to before apparently.

And, uh, that’s where he runs into the owner, uh, The

Izzy Fischer: Cuckoo Clock Cafe, guys. It’s not just the Cuckoo Cafe.

Steve Kondrick: Whatever, the Cuckoo Clock Cocopelli Cafe, whatever it is. He [00:41:00] runs into Gene Smart again, like, Oh, hey, nice seeing you here, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, you wanna try one of the strudels? Yeah, sure, that’d be great.

Oh, you’re gonna have an art auction here. That’s cool. What about that cuckoo clock? And then staring at it for a bit. And then we get some more of the montage. And we go back, and he’s looking at this cuckoo clock like it’s a goddamn magic eye picture. Like, I don’t know what he’s doing. When

Izzy Fischer: we go back to it, like, the chairs are up on the table, it’s like, shit’s closed.

Steve Kondrick: I wanna see the sailboat! But then he keeps going like, I’m just trying to figure out how to fix it, but you gotta tell me the story about this cuckoo clock. And she’s like, alright, sit down everybody, we’re gonna get a really important story about this cuckoo clock.

Izzy Fischer: It starts with a spell.

Steve Kondrick: And there was this great Giuseppe Spinelli.

I don’t know why that name’s in my head. They say he was 123 years old. And he built this in the year 1898. I’m like, so that guy was around in the 17th century. Nice. And it took him 11 years to make it and I’m just like, no it didn’t.

Izzy Fischer: He was 142.

Steve Kondrick: But he [00:42:00] hung it on a picture next to his wife and then he died.

So his soul haunts it to this very day. No, but that’s not where she goes with the story. It’s supposed to be romantic or something.

Mountain Man Dan: The weird thing is the first time he went in previously and he asked about it, she’s like, there’s a story behind it. She made it seem like it was going to be this long story.

But then when he came back for this visit, the story was like,

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, they didn’t even finish their glasses of wine.

Izzy Fischer: William Shatner didn’t even sip his wine. It was so short. Yeah.

Steve Kondrick: Shatner, like, at the end of the story, he’s like, So, where does the spell work in? Like, wasn’t there a spell involved? And I’m like, yeah, she’s bullshitting you, dude.

Like, she’s just making up stupid stories. Like, next she’s gonna be like, There were seven rings that were forged. Some were given to men and some to elves. These aren’t anyway.

Crew Chief Brad: One cuckoo clock to rule them all. No, it’s

Steve Kondrick: even better. Her response is, I don’t know exactly. And I’m like, oh, goddamn old people telling stories.

I put a diamond on my belt, which was the fashion at the time. [00:43:00]

Crew Chief Brad: Did I ever tell you the story about the cuckoo clock?

Izzy Fischer: Cuckoo clock of doom. Oh, wait. Sorry. That’s different.

Crew Chief Brad: Sit around, kids. Let me tell you a story.

Crew Chief Eric: Stop talking about the Dial of Destiny. Like, that’s a whole different movie.

Steve Kondrick: Is it

Steve & Izzy: though?

Steve Kondrick: Alright, so he’s on the bus the next day and he sees someone driving his car again. And he gets off the bus to chase it on foot, and I’m like, Bill, come on.

Crew Chief Brad: That’s faster.

Steve Kondrick: Come on, buddy. But luckily, good old Johnny on the spot, we find out his name is Torres, but the guy in the Impala or whatever, he’s like, Hey, what are you doing here?

You know, like, I’m like, Oh, follow that car. Okay. And they go to the junkyard, the, or Impound. It’s a junkyard, but it’s supposed to be, I guess, the That’s the holding facility for the police department? Is that

Izzy Fischer: what we’re Yeah, no, this is somebody’s backyard.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah.

Crew Chief Brad: 100%. It did not seem very secure.

Steve Kondrick: I wonder how the police department would like to know that meth is being produced on their lot.

So yeah, he gets caught like snooping around. And then he calls the guy a fucker. [00:44:00] And I’m like, again, You’re the one trespassing, dude. Whatever. So then him and his buddy, uh, Spinelli, they go to fix that cuckoo clock. And we get a montage of them awkwardly moving pieces and pulling on chains and obviously having no idea what the hell they’re doing and never putting two pieces together.

And I’m just like, Run time, run time, run time, gotta make it 88 minutes, you know?

Crew Chief Eric: Meanwhile, back at the ranch.

Steve Kondrick: Wouldn’t you know it, they somehow put it together. So they fix the clock, everybody hugs when it starts working, whatever. And then we get Gene Smart and the girl Sonya they work with are like, But what about the spell?

Oh, you mean the one about my one true love when it strikes? No, don’t say it! Ahhhh! Oh

Crew Chief Eric: my God, this was turning into like the Witches of Eastwick and stuff. I was like, what are we doing? Practical magic. We get it.

Steve Kondrick: He put the lime in the coconut. This is I think when we go back to the bar because then he’s like asking Spinelli like how long were you married?

Oh 42 years of marriage marty again. My name’s not marty. It’s victor[00:45:00]

Crew Chief Eric: Anybody seen my

Steve Kondrick: delorean if he would have been driving a delorean this movie would have been five stars. Oh my god

Crew Chief Brad: God, that would have been amazing.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, sure. I can drive you around

Crew Chief Brad: Or we’re going we don’t need licenses

Steve Kondrick: Got a Mr. Fusion in the back, like, No, no, it’s just, we’re making martinis. Making margaritas.

But then they’re like, Okay, yeah, let’s go to this art auction thing. You know, we see that, I guess, Jean Smart, She used to be a Nat Geo photographer, And she took a bunch of pictures of tortoises, Because tortoises are super cool. Definitely not turtles.

Steve & Izzy: Oh God, I

Steve Kondrick: just thought of the song. But yeah, they’re, like, doing an auction.

But first we cut to them smoking a blunt out back as is tradition, right? And then she’s like, oh, yeah, I grow my own. What do you think makes the strudel so good? And i’m like no Yeah, that’s

Izzy Fischer: why there’s seven dollars a strudel or whatever the sign says here in a minute.

Steve Kondrick: That’s just inflation

Crew Chief Brad: brutal economics

Crew Chief Eric: We also get this gem of a story About being in love and [00:46:00] first love and true love and all this kind of stuff.

And she tells about her escapades as a photographer,

Steve Kondrick: Tunisia and stuff. There was this guy in Morocco eggplant.

Crew Chief Eric: And then he’s going off about this story about third grade. And I’m like, wow, that was like one room schoolhouse kind of stuff. Right. But the punchline was delivered. So well to the story when I think that was the best moment between Gene Smart and William Shatner when she’s like, so how did that all turn out for you?

And he goes, she reported me to the principal. I was like, I laughed at that. I thought it was cute.

Steve Kondrick: And we forgot about the auction. Of course. So there was a bidding war over her tortoise photograph, by the way, in a frame, basically bidding went up to 10, 000 and who got it? Isai Morales.

Crew Chief Eric: Bill Adama.

Steve Kondrick: And then my whole like knowing where this movie was going to go.

I’m like, why? Just give 10, 000

Crew Chief Brad: when they were on the roof sharing their blunt and telling stories. And then he told the love story of his car. [00:47:00] I love how the only picture of his car he had is the one with the model that he shows to this woman that he’s trying to show. And it’s like zoomed in and all you see, 90 percent of the image is this half naked girl.

And he’s like, yeah, it’s my true love. What the fuck are you showing here, you dumbass? He’s trying to show me that game.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you played Forza? Here, here, you can use my profile.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, he’s got the wrong kind of game, Dan. Then they put two and two together and, oh my god, you’re the dipshit.

That was doing donuts outside. You almost killed all these people. And I thought like that was going to end their relationship, right? And then he, he was going to have to spend the whole movie, the whole rest of this shit. Yeah. Trying to get her back. And instead they just kind of glossed over it. And then it made sense because they’re high.

They didn’t even remember the story.

Steve & Izzy: It doesn’t

Crew Chief Brad: matter. You almost killed all these people, man.

Steve Kondrick: I was waiting three days later, like, Wait, you’re the guy who was driving that thing. Like, [00:48:00] I’m tired of my mental condition being called into question.

Crew Chief Brad: It was either the weed or just because they’re old, they forgot.

We’ll blame the weed.

Crew Chief Eric: The

Crew Chief Brad: writers

Crew Chief Eric: had a senior moment at this point. They didn’t know where to go.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, yeah. The whole movie is a senior moment that I’d like to forget.

Mountain Man Dan: They were smoking on the roof. It was funny because I was expecting to hear, you know, it’s good for my glaucoma or some shit. She did say it.

She said that. It’s good for arthritis I thought she said.

Steve Kondrick: Oh arthritis. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that’s right. Had to be a medical thing, right? Yeah, it was also around this time. The writers were like, well, hey, we want grand touring motorsports breakfix podcast talking about this movie How are we going to do that?

So the next morning she shows up at shatner’s house because you know, she has his address from Her uber app or whatever, cause she calls an uber for him. And she’s like, surprise, we’re going on a trip. So they go to a

Crew Chief Brad: track day,

Steve Kondrick: private BMW racetrack or something. Yes. Yes. And see, I didn’t know this when they showed up.

I was like, you know, he doesn’t have a license, right? Oh, you don’t need one. It’s a private track. I’m like, Well played.

Crew Chief Eric: All right, so this is where [00:49:00] we get to nerd out on cars a little bit. We’ve been really good about not talking about the Porsche and we’ll get back to it, I promise you. Because the Porsche hasn’t been seen for the past hour.

Exactly. But we get to see a whole bunch of BMWs now. So I have to ask Brad, Tanya, and Dan at this point, of the lineup of cars, going from the i8 on the right, the blue car. All the way back to the i3 that was in the shadows in the back left corner of all the six BMWs that were there. What would you have picked?

Crew Chief Brad: The A7 they were dropped off in.

Mountain Man Dan: That is the new BMW, you’re right. See, I was disappointed they didn’t have some other Porsches sitting there.

Crew Chief Eric: It’s a BMW test track. I looked it up. It’s

Steve Kondrick: a real place. Yeah, BMW paid for that sponsorship. They’re all going to be BMWs. Yeah,

Crew Chief Brad: I would have taken one of the M3s. I would not have taken the i8.

Izzy Fischer: You don’t have to choose, you get to drive them all.

Crew Chief Brad: That’s

Crew Chief Eric: true. I personally would have chosen the satin black with rose gold M4 competition coupe that was sitting there next to the i8. That thing was hot. That was a [00:50:00] cool car. That’s the car to pick right there. But he chose the bright electric blue i8.

That was his first and then he did hop into the others. Well they didn’t show any of that so you don’t know what he picked. He could have picked that orange M3 that was two cars over and there was a bunch of other stuff. He kind of headed to driving them all. That M4 competition though was pretty hot.

But Tanya, what was the biggest problem with the i8? to

Crew Chief Brad: BMW.

Izzy Fischer: Well, I don’t think they quite got the exhaust tone correct. And why is that?

Crew Chief Eric: You

Izzy Fischer: know, it was a little bit louder than I was expecting for an electric

Crew Chief Brad: car. Yeah, yeah.

I don’t think the i8 is a full electric. I think it’s a hybrid.

Steve Kondrick: Is it?

Crew Chief Brad: Pretty sure.

Steve Kondrick: Well, it still should have sounded like it was from the Jetsons or something like Oh, you’re right. Like in

Crew Chief Eric: hybrid. But it should have been running on all electric in the beginning because of the plugin. Not when he dropped on it.

Crew Chief Brad: I8s are cheap too, you can get one for 60 grand. Is that all? Yeah, they don’t sell for shit. They were like 300, 000 when they [00:51:00] first came out. You

Izzy Fischer: can get a used 2017 from CarGurus for 63, 495 for 2, 000 miles, or you can get a brand new, just kidding, there’s no brand new one. No,

Crew Chief Eric: they stopped making it like when they stopped making the NSX.

It’s been like five years.

Izzy Fischer: No, there still is a new one. There’s no price on it. That expensive, they don’t list the price. If you have

Steve Kondrick: to ask, it just says market value, like it’s a goddamn lobster or something. More

Crew Chief Brad: than you can afford, pal. I

Crew Chief Eric: Anyway, for the speed that they were going in this thing, it should have been like whisper quiet.

Yes. I took issue.

Crew Chief Brad: They should not have reached the gas motor mode.

Crew Chief Eric: Exactly. So it should have sounded like a golf cart up until that point, but whatever, you know, Hey, good for him. So is this because of B rocks training and Forza and everything else that he can now drive on the BMW test track? Cause we saw what happened when he was behind the wheel of the Camry.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. I guess when he’s. Focused and not trying. I was kind of expecting the guy in the Impala to like pull up alongside him. I’m like, hey fancy meet you here

Izzy Fischer: He wants to drive this [00:52:00] car.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, he

Izzy Fischer: doesn’t want to drive the shitty Camry He doesn’t want to drive with somebody else in the car. He wants this car and he wants to impress this girl.

He’s motivated by love

Crew Chief Brad: The issue with the Camry too was remember because they overlaid The old test track and the new improved test track at the DMV with all the cones. That’s right. That were a lot closer together. It’s rigged. The system is rigged. That’s right. I forgot about that. There was a lot more room on that BMW test track.

The

Crew Chief Eric: DA was not in control of the BMW test facility.

Crew Chief Brad: Not a turn signal was to be seen, though.

Crew Chief Eric: How ageist. BMWs don’t come with them.

Crew Chief Brad: No, it’s true. Weight savings.

Crew Chief Eric: Meanwhile, back at the cuckoo clock.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, yeah. So at the end, though, after the vroom, vrooms, they go, Wee! And then they kiss. Awesome.

Izzy Fischer: They go vroom, vroom.

And then they go,

Steve Kondrick: Exactly. We got to compare this. To Jeff

Crew Chief Eric: Bridges.

Steve Kondrick: So, we did kind of mention that for this next scene, yes. So now it’s night [00:53:00] time. We’re down in Ancient Ruins this time. We’re back at the Cuckoo Clock Cafe. And Jean Smart’s like, Hey Bill, I got something to show you in the cafe. No, they go in and she’s got What?

Another copy of her photograph framed? And he doesn’t even have to drop 10 grand for this one? That’s cool, I guess. Anyway, so then he pops a pill and they fuck.

Izzy Fischer: We get to see her cute little apartment, which is Is just the guest room of the cafe?

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah. I feel like we glossed over a very important piece of information about the Cuckoo Clock Cafe.

And we, we got to rewind to when they were working on it. They actually got it to work. I don’t think we’ve mentioned that.

Crew Chief Eric: Welcome to three minutes ago, Brad. No, I don’t think we’ve mentioned it. They did, because that’s when, you know, the spell was broken and the whole, we already covered that. It’s all good.

Steve did a very good job of just summarizing that, but glossed over the part that not [00:54:00] only did he pop the Viagra, what did he do, Dan?

Mountain Man Dan: In regards to, uh, when he’s like, I think he made a comment, like, if my call lasts for more than, like, four hours, call my doctors. Yeah, because

Crew Chief Eric: he’s choking on the damn thing, right?

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, I know. That was when I’m like, oh no, this is when the ambulance gets called, and he has a heart condition, too. This love story takes a sad turn.

Izzy Fischer: This, though, might be the most realistic romance scene I’ve seen in a movie in a while. It’s between this and The Simpsons in Shalalala. This is real life.

Crew Chief Eric: Compared to Against All Odds, I wasn’t totally grossed out. I wasn’t like, oh my god, this needs to stop. This is bleh. Like, they were believable at least. Like, Jeff Bridges and that other chick. I don’t know.

Steve Kondrick: Whatever. Hanging on the ruins. And then Isai Morales jumps in with a gun and is like, I’m taking you back to James Woods.

Crew Chief Eric: But you know, it would have been really funny. Okay. This is where I thought it would have been comedic gold. William Shatner pops the pill. He’s choking on it. He says, call a [00:55:00] doctor four hours, that kind of thing as Dan pointed out. But you know, when they’re actually getting it on, he could have been like, beat me up, Scotty.

Wow.

Steve Kondrick: Eric, how long have you been directing thorns?

Crew Chief Brad: I thought he would have said victory!

Steve Kondrick: Text track three, The Wrath of Ra. Deadly Crane. And Christopher Lloyd was in it too. So then we cut to the next morning. And of course, the pill’s still working, so he’s like, Hey, maybe one more round? Open the cafe a little later?

And then that random guy is like, really pissed because the cafe’s closed. Oh, we’ve all been there. He’s gotta get his marijuana strudel. Gotta get my donuts for the weekend. This place isn’t open on time. Nobody wants to work anymore.

Crew Chief Eric: Booper.

Steve Kondrick: But then she’s like, hey, so I kind of need some more publicity for the tortoises.

And I’m like, I

Izzy Fischer: was so bad. I’m like, girl, what?

Steve Kondrick: I’m like, two things. One, he does have the post net clarity. [00:56:00] So I mean, maybe he is willing to like help out. And I’m like, but two, it’s like, didn’t you just get 10 grand unexpectedly from Esai Morales the other night? No, they need more money.

Mountain Man Dan: There was other stuff for sale too, but

Steve Kondrick: that’s the only thing they showed.

She’s gotta sell that cuckoo clock. I thought that was gonna be a thing.

Crew Chief Eric: Again, this is where I draw the parallels to Against All Odds. She used Jeff Bridges in the same way that she’s using William Shatner right now. I was like, okay, I can see where this is going. And

Steve Kondrick: that’s when the ex husband James Woods shows up and is like, I found you.

I finally found you. You’re coming back with me, baby. No, but uh, you know, he’s uh, doing the game of concentration poolside at the girls in bikinis and stuff, but he’s able to focus. He’s doing better now. Either that or he has no peripheral vision anymore and he’s going blind because coughing and had an erection for more than four hours and it’s all getting dark.

Later in the day, he sees her and uh, Isai Morales hanging out and so he’s like, Huh. What the hell’s going on here?

Crew Chief Eric: This is when he returns to the grocery store, right?

Steve Kondrick: Yes, that’s right. The grocery store. That’s right. That’s where

Crew Chief Eric: At which point [00:57:00] my wife asks, this is what she got out of this scene, all the rest of it included.

She goes, who organized this grocery store? What? So she points out that the honey buns are next to the coffee and then there’s something else and something else. She’s like, who organized this grocery? This is maddening.

Steve Kondrick: When do you

Izzy Fischer: have honey buns? In the morning with your coffee. Exactly. Like that actually makes sense.

But the rum and bowls that were next to it.

Crew Chief Eric: Cause he had the munchies. It’s the apple strudel aisle. That’s what it is.

Steve Kondrick: The strudel aisle as they call it in the munchie aisle.

Crew Chief Eric: So now he heads out to the parking lot where he bumps into Amy slash Angie.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. So like right when he’s like trying to like kind of follow Gene Spartan Eastheimer, I’ll see what’s going on there.

Then it’s like, Oh, hi, I know you. Oh, and Amy, Angela, Angela. Hey, yeah, we had some good times. I guess his old flame or whatever. Hey, can I ask a favor? And she got all

Crew Chief Eric: mad, right? And I don’t know. Of course, they quickly glazed [00:58:00] over how she went from pissed to happy to pissed again, but that’s fine. But what I thought was great about this is she’s confronting you don’t even remember my name.

Do you ever remember? And he’s like, uh, uh, uh, and I was expecting him to have a Boston legal moment here and go mad cow. That was the answer to everything. I’m busted legal when he couldn’t get his way out. I am mad cow moments opportunities lost in this. He

Crew Chief Brad: essentially said that because he said like he wasn’t doing well.

And then she took it as like he had some major health issues. So he indirectly said mad cow.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, so he guilts her basically into giving him a ride or whatever, and like, Hey, just follow that red jeep.

Crew Chief Brad: Because that’s not weird at all.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, but then she like pulls up alongside it, and he just like drops that seat down to hide.

She’s like, Hey, that’s your buddy Isai Morales. That’s who you wanted to talk to, right? Hi, hello. Isai Morales even like rolls down his window and stuff and is like, Hi, do I know you? What’s this about you? Come on, get up, get up. And you know, he won’t. He’s, Cowering or whatever.

Crew Chief Brad: That’s my girlfriend.

Steve Kondrick: Cut to [00:59:00] him left on the side of the road as he peels out.

I was kind of expecting the cops to pull her over down the street how fast she was got out of there.

Izzy Fischer: Right? He’s also gonna lose her license. They’re gonna take classes together.

Steve Kondrick: Nah. Instead, I guess he takes a taxi to the golf course that he knew they were going to. Cool. Steals a golf cart from somebody.

And peeps on them and sees them like in their robes and stuff at the golf course. And I’m like Okay, someone’s gonna have to explain this to me later. Maybe it’s a golf course and spa. I don’t know.

Crew Chief Eric: But it never gets explained. No. Okay, I just want to make sure I didn’t miss anything.

Izzy Fischer: Looking at the cast, there was like somebody in the cast and it said that dude’s neighbor.

I was like, when the hell did we ever meet a woman that was his neighbor? But it’s then, right? Isn’t there like some woman like staring? So was that his house next to a golf

Crew Chief Brad: course? Yeah, I mean, there are houses on golf courses all over the place.

Steve Kondrick: That makes way more sense. Okay, like he has the hot tub or something, and a couple, okay, okay.

Crew Chief Brad: He lives on a country club.

Steve Kondrick: [01:00:00] Alright, so when they were talking about their torrid love affairs stuff before, she mentioned that she had a child. She didn’t say son or daughter, and I’m like, I got it, Isai Morales is her son. That’s gonna be the thing.

Izzy Fischer: No, I figured it

Steve Kondrick: was the girl. They’re doing a spa date. I knew it was the girl.

Yeah. Mommy, mommy son spa date, those things happen.

Crew Chief Brad: I knew he was gay the whole time.

Steve Kondrick: Hold on a second, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Sons can be gay, it’s okay.

Steve & Izzy: Okay.

Crew Chief Brad: No, no, no. But I knew that the angle was going to be that he’s gay, not that he was like related.

Crew Chief Eric: I figured that out too.

I guessed it at one point, right? I sort of thought, okay, maybe she’s in the robe and she’s doing like a nude portrait and he’s painting her or something like that. So I was going to play it off as maybe it’s a little bit more innocent, which is then how I kind of put it together to say, well, he’s not interested in her romantically because he’s an artist and he’s gay and whatever.

And then, you know, we come to find out later, the guy driving the Audi is. And all that kind of stuff. But what confused me though, is that it took you two thirds of the movie and you didn’t [01:01:00] realize the girl from the cuckoo clock cafe was her daughter. Like you thought the painter was her son.

Steve Kondrick: I assume she was at the beginning, but it wasn’t mentioned.

So I’m like, Oh no, it’s just like. The girl that look, honestly, it’s her granddaughter. Let’s be for real,

Steve & Izzy: right? ,

Steve Kondrick: that girl is 19 to 22. Jean Smart’s in her early eighties. That’s her granddaughter.

Izzy Fischer: Jean Smart supposedly had her when she was like 19

Steve Kondrick: in Venezuela. Back before it was Communist or something. It

Izzy Fischer: was Egypt.

Steve Kondrick: It was Egypt. It was Egypt. Oh, okay. I know. Yeah. It was Egypt back in the reign of Ramsey’s IV

Crew Chief Eric: I think we broke Tanya this time. Apparently, Ancient Egyptian is her trigger there, Steve. You got her. That’s her baseball bat on the forehead. Right there. Ramsey’s the four. You’ve done it.

Steve Kondrick: And see, also, Sonia or whatever her name is, I thought she was the girl from Entourage. Emmanuel Shariki or whatever, however you say her last name.[01:02:00]

So, yeah, what the hell happens from here? He sees him in the robes. Oh yeah, he gets the cops called on him because he’s peeping on people in their robes during nude painting hour or whatever. Of course, it’s the same, the one lady cop. Because she’s at the golf course now. It’s not just their local security or whatever.

Crew Chief Brad: That’s the only cop duo in Palm Springs.

Crew Chief Eric: Mayberry. It’s like Barney.

Crew Chief Brad: They run all of Palm Springs is their beat.

Steve Kondrick: Palm Springs 9 1 1 or whatever. But he’s like, yeah, just, just looking for my ball out of wild three, like. Hmm, you’re lucky this time as they pull up like an lwl3 ball and I’m like, wait, did he know that?

Did he?

Izzy Fischer: Oh, no, the look on his face is like oh god. He’s like,

Steve Kondrick: holy shit I’m, not even a golfer, but the next day he’s at the cafe and he’s like, hey So I saw you with Isai Morales and blah blah blah and she’s like, oh you were spying on me like well No, I was just on a golf course and I saw you there And you don’t trust me?

Fine, you need to leave. Okay, drama. And I’m like, just hell each other. Like, oh, he’s my son, [01:03:00] is what I was thinking at the time. Oh my god. But, but no, it’s even worse. Like, oh no,

Crew Chief Brad: we’re back to this shit.

Steve Kondrick: My friend slash patron of the arts that comes here all the time. And I was posing for him. for you.

Crew Chief Brad: Nude.

Steve Kondrick: He was painting a nude photo of me

Crew Chief Brad: for you.

And then cut to the picture, but instead of George Costanza, it’s her. Yeah, exactly.

Steve Kondrick: Exactly. And then guys, guess what? This would be the end of the movie.

Izzy Fischer: This is why Roll

Steve Kondrick: credits. Who cares if he gets his car back? That’s

Izzy Fischer: why I hate rom coms, because I hate the stupid misunderstanding that would just be like, oh, you’re jealous of the painter?

But no, it’s like, no, I can’t say that.

Crew Chief Brad: Oh god, it was so cringy. The cuckoo clock told me you were the one.

Steve Kondrick: I was also waiting for like the whole thing like, oh, I just can’t believe you’re cheating on me, blah, blah, blah. And I was waiting for a reply like, hey, how’s that model from the first act doing?

Izzy Fischer: Right?

Crew Chief Eric: I’m waiting for Angela [01:04:00] Lansbury to show up as her mother to give her advice.

Ooh, I got some bad news about that, Eric.

Izzy Fischer: Angela Lansbury, may she rest in peace.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh, sorry. I forgot. But that’s what I was thinking. I was like, we need a motherly character for the mother to put her in her place.

Izzy Fischer: Dame Judi Dench to show her. There you go. She’s

Crew Chief Eric: too busy filming Shazam.

Izzy Fischer: Then Steve and I had one of these moments in our relationship early on.

He had several, like, lady friends who were gorgeous, way prettier than me. who he hung out with all the time. And I remember at one point I was like, Hey, so are you guys dating? Like, are we not exclusive? Or did you guys used to date? And it was a really simple answer. Steve started laughing. I was like, Oh God, no.

I would never touch any of them. I’ve seen what they look like.

Steve Kondrick: Exactly. I don’t love these hoes. I’m about the dough. Get back. And then I sent them back to the corner.

Crew Chief Brad: You guys use these things called words. Yeah. To communicate. With each other.

Steve Kondrick: Or pictographs if words

Crew Chief Eric: don’t work.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, they don’t know

Crew Chief Eric: how to use those in these movies.

That costs extra when you add more words in the movie. It [01:05:00] costs more.

Izzy Fischer: We spend all of our money on that history of the cuckoo clock scene.

Crew Chief Brad: Oh my god, they, yeah, they blew the budget. It takes this 150 movie to 152.

Izzy Fischer: Are you kidding? Renting those cars for a day is more than 152.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, yeah, for sure. And here’s the stupidest part of that.

She then goes back and tells Sonya like, You believe that he thinks that me and Esai Morales are a thing?

Izzy Fischer: Ah! Right? And I’m like, You don’t You told him you’re not, right? Like, this is when we get to, No, I just can’t stand jealous men.

Crew Chief Eric: This is also the point where Steve should have gone, Oh, she’s the daughter.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, this was The point when they mentioned it specifically that she was the daughter because I thought it was going to be Isai Morales. They specifically said child.

Mountain Man Dan: Plot twist. And she was like, mom, what are you doing? Because she was sitting there on the floor drunk.

Steve Kondrick: We’ve all been there.

Mountain Man Dan: She calls everybody mom.

Crew Chief Eric: She said something coy about like only one drink out of this bottle or something like that. It was like,

Mountain Man Dan: okay. But prior to [01:06:00] that, the thing I’m surprised that Steve didn’t pick up on was the fact that earlier in the movie they were talking and she was like regarding the cuckoo clock and she was like, well, what about, you know, what grandma said about it or whatever?

Crew Chief Eric: Exactly. There were so many like little things.

Steve Kondrick: What about what grandma used to say? You mean what I used to say being your grandmother? I didn’t have a child when I was 68.

Crew Chief Eric: She could have been Belladonna’s daughter. I mean, yes, I can see where you would get that confused for sure.

Steve Kondrick: So what happens, oh yeah, so Vic and his buddy Torres now, cause they’re buddies now, the guy in the Impala, they go to the junkyard cause he says, fuck it, I’m gonna break in and steal my car, I guess.

Crew Chief Eric: I wrote down a note, he’s walking down the road, and Torres walks up to him, right, cause isn’t he carrying groceries again or something like that? Yeah, yeah,

Mountain Man Dan: yeah. Wants

Crew Chief Eric: to give him a ride. I wrote down, is he eating a push pop?

Mountain Man Dan: He was drinking it.

Crew Chief Eric: Is that what he was doing? There’s that like scene you see it in a lot of like older films, a guy’s walking down the road, you know, with an ice cream or a beer or something.

And he’s just kind of slowly doing whatever. And he’s doing the same thing, but I’m like, is that a push pop? Like, is that a Flintstones push pop?

Mountain Man Dan: It looked like he was drinking it because it kind of [01:07:00] goes back to earlier. in the movie and he had his groceries and his ice cream melted. This is the deep

Crew Chief Eric: plot that is in this movie.

So yes, he gets picked up by Torres.

Steve Kondrick: Also, is Torres following him now?

Crew Chief Eric: I’m wondering, he’s a little stalkery, right?

Steve Kondrick: Yeah,

Crew Chief Eric: a little

Steve Kondrick: bit.

Crew Chief Brad: Palm Springs is not very big, apparently.

Crew Chief Eric: And the guy’s unemployed, so boom.

Crew Chief Brad: Yes.

Steve Kondrick: So they go to like break in and steal his car back, but the car’s gone! Nope, there it is, it’s right over there.

And they overhear like a conversation of like, Oh yeah, 200, you get it for the day or whatever the hell it was. Like. You’re renting out my car, you asshole! And confrontation happens and Torres has it all on his phone or whatever. Allegedly. I was pretty sure that was just

Crew Chief Eric: a ruse. That was like one of those badass videos they did in sunny in Philadelphia.

He’s like,

Steve Kondrick: Operation Badass! Project Badass!

Mountain Man Dan: Well, this is where you can find the quality of the place they’re storing the car at. Because as they roll up, they show like a picture of the little office. There’s a piece of plywood above the door. That’s just spray painted. Like where some stencils, this has Johnny’s junk.

Did that

Crew Chief Eric: look [01:08:00] familiar to you, Dan? No, it is

Mountain Man Dan: backyard.

Steve Kondrick: Nice. But, uh, so yeah, Shatner starts having a heart attack and I’m like. Okay, he’s pretending so then they’ll like casually get the keys, take the car, drive off, and he’s like, Hey, worked like a charm. Nope, he was really having a heart attack, but that’s exactly what happened as they drive off. You know, they end up getting like a police escort from lady cop.

We’re like, no, the guy’s having a heart attack.

Crew Chief Eric: I’m going to mention again, 44 horsepower. Okay. Like this is a high speed pursuit. And then they’re yelling at each other. He’s not a ticket to the hospital and then he get the police escort. It’s like the slowest police chase ever.

Mountain Man Dan: Did you notice the second police car come out of nowhere instantly on their tail?

Yeah. When

Crew Chief Eric: you’re only going 44 miles an hour. I mean, come on. It’s not hard to catch this. They were called

Steve Kondrick: from two counties over and caught up. Yeah, so then he goes to the hospital, and a couple days later, whatever, he’s at the bar, and Spinelli’s like, Hey, how was it? Like, I don’t know. Near death experience.

I don’t want to be like Ted, the guy on the [01:09:00] scooter. Okay. I want to be with Carolyn. Oh, okay, cool. Then just go talk to her. That’s all you need to do, guys. Instead, he’s like, hey, can you, uh, can you help me change awkwardly for the next three or four minutes? Change out of these hospital clothes and into pants.

Crew Chief Eric: I expected to see William Shatner butt cheeks.

Steve Kondrick: I was gripping the sides of the chair. Well, I see the captain’s log. Don’t you lie to me.

Crew Chief Eric: I was not ready for that. I’m like, I’m gonna be Emotionally. Just scorned for the rest of my life.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, that’s why this thing’s rated R. I know now.

Izzy Fischer: Little William Shatner in there.

Steve Kondrick: Looks like he had a little work in there done. But yeah, basically after the awkward changing or whatever, they then show up at like Spinelli’s arts and crafts class at the retirement home.

And guys, the greatest song ever written starts playing. Because it’s [01:10:00] like, it’s a tortoise. Not a turtle, a tortoise is on land and a turtle in the water.

Crew Chief Eric: And you know the best part of that is, my wife goes, That’s a Perry Gripz song. I’m like, oh no.

Steve Kondrick: She has the greatest hits album. My

Crew Chief Eric: kids listen to that stuff.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, so then we go down to the fundraising tortoise rally that has brought all the dozen of people in town. The news are there, like, yeah, sorry, I think it’s gonna be turned out a little later once, I don’t know, the whole folks are done with their soup. Yeah, not quite the turnout they were looking for, but Honk honk, who is it?

It’s a goddamn golf cart with a paper mache turtle shell. Obama,

Crew Chief Eric: it’s not just a golf cart, it’s a posse of golf carts.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, it is. All of the golf course.

Crew Chief Eric: And the rascals, right? Exactly. But did you see some of those golf carts? There was a hot rod, like ZZ Top golf cart. That thing was cool.

Steve Kondrick: And if this were in Florida, it’d be those grizzlies or whatever with the giant wheels Be a snapping turtle.

Crew Chief Brad: [01:11:00] But

Steve Kondrick: yeah, so they, uh, pull up and like, Oh my God, that’s so amazing. Quick. Get it on film. The mildest of winds come by and launch that bitch into space. I

Crew Chief Eric: mean, it’s made of paper. Izzy, you make crafts. How late is paper? Mache

Izzy Fischer: is quite light, but not. a Eight foot turtle disappearing into space while we were watching this.

I was like, oh this thing just landed on like i 90 Killed seven truck drivers

Steve Kondrick: What I wanted the next scene to be is like, yeah, it flies off or whatever Everybody’s like, oh my god, blah blah blah. I wanted to go to the junkyard And the guy who just stole the car from is like, RAAAAH!!! And it lands on him.

No!

Crew Chief Eric: No, No, it’s opportunity lost again. Right? I thought we were on the same wavelength. The thing gets rocketed up into the air as, as Izzy’s saying. And they’re doin the whole, oh my god, he’s, it’s this chivalry thing and romanced by him yet again. And blah, blah, blah, this kind of stuff. And as he pulls up, or pulls away actually, cause she’s busy with the news.

He kind of drives off in the golf cart. What would have [01:12:00] been awesome, is if it had descended. Good. You know, from the stratosphere burning up on re entry and then crashed into the ground in a smoldering pile behind them. Like, that would have been epic.

Crew Chief Brad: I feel like you’re picturing this as a Mel Brooks movie.

A

Steve Kondrick: hundred percent.

Crew Chief Brad: They didn’t hit the budget for the fire. By

Steve Kondrick: the way, where’s Mel Brooks? He should be in this movie.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, where’s Mel Brooks?

Izzy Fischer: He should be the guy on the scooter. You guys, what should have happened was when he’s taking his final driving test, He’s pulling out onto the main rope and the turtle crashes behind him as he pulls out.

Steve Kondrick: The instructor is like, congratulations, the first perfect driving test I’ve ever given. Steps out, boom, flaming tortoise shell.

Crew Chief Eric: It should have been used just like in Stuntman where the plane just keeps nose diving. Turtle shell just shows up continuously.

Crew Chief Brad: Mario Kart around the [01:13:00] place.

Crew Chief Eric: They look up, it’s flying by

Steve Kondrick: he leaves while she’s talking to reporters or whatever and he’s like watching the news later that night and like the only clip is like the thing flying off and him screaming, oh shit,

That was a good scene though. That was a good scene. Then he goes like for his morning walk or whatever, and there’s this guy, I just have his dude. ’cause every word out of his mouth is dude. He’s like, dude. That was cool yesterday, dude. Yeah, thanks, dude. Hey half a million hits, dude. Is that a good thing

Izzy Fischer: dude?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, yeah, the dog little dude.

Crew Chief Eric: Did you know the dog’s actual name is prince joff g o f f. Of

Steve Kondrick: course

Izzy Fischer: Prince geoff

Crew Chief Eric: Anyway, moving on.

Steve Kondrick: So now it’s the big day of, uh, his retest. He has zero fatalities as far as we see. And this is where, yeah, like the district attorney’s like watching him with binoculars.

Crew Chief Brad: Cause she just hangs out at the DMV.

Crew Chief Eric: That’s how it is in that family.

Steve Kondrick: How bad is your life? And all of his bar buddies are there too, like hiding under the one tree so that they can be in the shade for more than [01:14:00] 15 minutes. And they’re all like cheering him on like, yeah, good job. Oh, that’s right. He goes on to the actual road and he like slams on the brakes.

The instructor’s like, what the hell? What’s going on? Like, and he gets out and he gets a tortoise out of the street. And I’m like, so the instructor didn’t see that. Uh, okay. Well, whatever. I don’t know. But he saved the tortoise and took it back out to some sand 10 feet away from the road. I

Mountain Man Dan: have to give William Shatner some credit because I picked up turtles that size and they’re not very light.

So I’ll give him some credit for picking a heavy thing up.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah.

Crew Chief Brad: It was made of paper mache.

Steve Kondrick: And then he flew off into space. Like, little Gamera, just, Ran to all children.

Steve & Izzy: But,

Steve Kondrick: uh, And so that reminds him, Oh, that’s right, I want to be with Carolyn, so he goes to the cafe. Yeah, he’s there. She introduces Sonya as her daughter.

Isai Morales shows up. They, like, kiss or whatever. And he’s like, oh, all right. No match for Isai Morales, obviously. He’s like 50 years my junior.

Crew Chief Eric: Her son.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah, that’s what I thought. That’s why, like, the kissing thing here in [01:15:00] the last scene, I’m like, well, at this point I’d already figured out, okay, so Sonia’s the one child that she had and spoke of, or whatever.

Like, then who is Isai Morales? Is he just some painter dude that hangs out with? Yeah, that makes sense, too. Why didn’t she just say that? I don’t know, because then we’d have the last 30 minutes of this movie. But, uh, yeah, then we meet Isai Morales husband, Brian. Oh, hi nice to meet you. And then yeah, she mentioned something about doing a painting and I’m like a nude painting?

When’s that coming out? Is that going to be at the next auction? After they finally explain it a little bit, not much, but just enough, and they’re like, oh, I’m sorry, and they kiss. And then everyone in the cafe applauds because they have nothing better to do in their life. Roll credits. Nope! There’s more, guys.

Because then we go to Vic’s house. Carolyn’s visiting, and Torres is there too, like, helping, like, fix the car, right? Because he’s got the Porsche back, everybody. He passed his test and all that. And then he basically hands Torres the keys, like, Hey, you wanna do the honors? Take it for a test drive, make me an offer, I’ve found my new baby, and then kisses [01:16:00] Carolyn.

Izzy Fischer: So fake! Lies! Not both, don’t give up the car.

Crew Chief Brad: Yeah, right? Joke’s on you, Torres, it’s a kit car. It’s not a real Porsche.

Steve Kondrick: I can’t believe I didn’t realize that when I was fixing it.

Crew Chief Eric: So that’s an interesting point you bring up there, Brad, and I’m glad we’re finally at this because the ending scene has a lot to do with the 356.

And I was convinced it didn’t say Speedster on the side. It was a super 1600 on the back. The lights were definitely 55 like all this kind of stuff. I was really trying to place the car and there was a couple shots of the interiors. It didn’t look right. They just looked out of period for like a 55, 356.

And Tanya said, she goes, it says something with a C on the side, right? And I’m like, Oh, it must be like some custom, like a Beck or something like that, or replica. It’s really a beetle, you know, or whatever. Turns out it’s a real three 56. I got confirmation that there’s an owner. It’s thing. There was a PCA.

Decal on the rear grill and all that kind of stuff. So it turns out it’s actually a very special three 56, 55, three 56 [01:17:00] continental. And so they did this limited run. Portia did where they kind of mimic the Lincoln continental idea, super luxurious, had all this other kind of stuff. And what’s really interesting about it is it’s sort of this.

Half year split between the early 356s and when the 356As came out and followed by the Bs, the Cs, and the Carrera GS and all that stuff. So it’s like a really limited run of 356. So it’s actually a pretty rare car. Once I kind of found that out, it gave me a new focus on the film to say, Why did they pick that when they could have gotten any other run of the mill early 356 they wanted to?

But they chose that maybe because they knew somebody that had it. you know, in their garage, whatever the, you know, low in the car. But still, it’s pretty interesting that like a lot of the stars in the film, it into itself is a star in the collector car community, especially in the Porsche community. So I thought that was pretty cool.

Steve & Izzy: Yeah. Okay.

Steve Kondrick: Yeah. So yeah, Torres drives in that, but then almost immediately Shatner pulls up in that [01:18:00] BMW i8, the blue one from the track or whatever. I’m like, Oh, That’s the new baby he’s found. He was just pulling Carol’s chain. I get it. All right. And then, uh, yeah, they do a little vroom vroom at the light.

I assume they both get pulled over and we get a sequel. And then we get Spinelli the Impala, like hitting them switches. Everyone wants to see Christopher Lloyd hitting switches.

Steve & Izzy: Yeah.

Mountain Man Dan: Alright, did you guys notice at the one point, I think he actually smacked his head on the roof of the car. Oh, he totally did.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He gave himself a concussion. It was painful. Like, that’s why you wear a seatbelt. When Christopher Lloyd rolls off into, like, the desert area, first thing that came to mind to me was the one episode of Roadkill where they got one and took it off roading. I’m gonna take it up to you, like.

Crew Chief Eric: Yeah, I can see where you’re going, yeah. But that car suited him, though. He looked good in that car.

Steve Kondrick: It worked for him. He is Christopher Lloyd.

Crew Chief Eric: Roll credits. There was no bonus. You know, I didn’t really stay around to the end, and even if there was extra, I don’t think it would have mattered.

Steve Kondrick: I didn’t either.

I think some bloopers

Crew Chief Eric: or some outtakes would have been fun for this movie, though. [01:19:00] This is a

Steve Kondrick: Burt Reynolds movie? What are you expecting here?

Crew Chief Eric: Him and Dom DeLuise, right, going at it. He’s

Crew Chief Brad: expecting the Marvel clip at the end of the credits. Samuel

Steve Kondrick: L. Jackson shows up for the sequel. If he was the bus driver the whole time.

Crew Chief Brad: Ah, on that note.

Steve Kondrick: So yeah, guys, that’s Senior Moment. Would you recommend it?

Crew Chief Brad: Yes. Fun for the whole family.

Steve Kondrick: It’s

Izzy Fischer: a great date night movie.

Crew Chief Brad: Liar.

Steve Kondrick: Parents will love it.

Crew Chief Brad: You can Netflix and blue pill.

Crew Chief Eric: Who is this? Go, Kirk. You’re slap, happy grandpappy. I love it.

Steve Kondrick: Oh my God. So is that recommendations all around then? Mailman Dan?

Mountain Man Dan: I’m middle of the road on this one. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. We’ve seen much worse train wrecks than this.

Izzy Fischer: Go in with real low expectations. That way they’re read.

Crew Chief Brad: Lowered expectations. That’s what it is.

Izzy Fischer: There’s definitely worse movies than that movie. If you’re doing something else and need background noise. [01:20:00]

Steve Kondrick: You want it to be William Shatner for some reason.

Crew Chief Eric: You put on Frazier instead. Now I know how this works.

Steve Kondrick: Don’t listen to his album. Listen to Senior Moment.

Mountain Man Dan: The Rascal Bumper Cars. Portion of the movie just made it from

Crew Chief Eric: the driving test was definitely up there

Mountain Man Dan: to

Crew Chief Eric: there again. There’s these little vignettes these little moments that you can stitch together into the trailer for this movie And you’ve seen the whole thing which is the disappointing part I felt like I saw the whole movie before I saw the movie which is fine and neither here nor there But i’m with dan i’m sort of 50 50 on this My wife comes to the table and says there’s nothing redeeming.

There was a painful lack of story, no plot, no point, toxic masculinity. Like, there’s a lot of things in the negative column. Don’t disagree with her and that’s why I’m 50 50 on it. But on the same token, I look at it and go, It’s Jean Smart. It’s Half of the Sheen clan, it’s this, it’s that. It’s one

Steve Kondrick: of the

Crew Chief Eric: Sheens.

Izzy Fischer: It’s a flying turtle. It’s

Steve Kondrick: one of the Estevez’s, guys.

Crew Chief Brad: It’s the Estevez B side.

Steve Kondrick: Look, if Charlie and Emilio showed up [01:21:00] filming Young Guns 3 or something, yeah, that’d be great, but that’s not this one.

Crew Chief Eric: All of that aside, the point is, You have to appreciate it for William Shatner doing a movie at 90 years old and looking good doing it.

He’s still there and I feel like he’s drinking from whatever Fountain of Youth Betty White was at. I want to see him do another movie like this when he’s 100. For that alone, it’s worth watching because how many times do you get to see a 90 plus year old actor Doing something like this in hollywood.

Steve Kondrick: Well now the christopher plumber’s gone

Crew Chief Eric: But but you get my point though, right? So for that I appreciate it.

Steve Kondrick: Oh, yeah, totally I get it Yeah, it’s impressive. I’ll give it that it was better than I thought but guys it doesn’t matter what we think because rotten tomatoes Oh god, what do you think the critics thought do we have any numbers out of 100?

How many thought it was good tanya pretty low, but I saw what the number was brad.

Crew Chief Brad: Is it single digits. Is that your guess? I’m gonna [01:22:00] guess nine and a half percent. Robin.

Mountain Man Dan: Mandan. I was thinking like, probably like a 33, 34.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh, okay.

Izzy Fischer: Eric?

Crew Chief Eric: I know the answer, so I can’t say. I’m gonna stay. Izzy?

Izzy Fischer: I am gonna go with my super generous 17 percent.

I believe

Steve Kondrick: Izzy is the closest. It’s 21 percent with the critics.

Izzy Fischer: But.

Steve Kondrick: What about that audience score? The one that really matters.

Izzy Fischer: Fuck those critics!

Steve Kondrick: Izzy, any guess on the audience?

Izzy Fischer: Uh, 25. Brad?

Crew Chief Brad: I’m gonna guess zero because nobody watched it.

Mountain Man Dan: Alright, Dan? I’m gonna say a drop down to like 15 on that.

Steve Kondrick: 76 percent with the audience.

Guys, when you’re doing the audience score, you have to be like, Who’s gonna watch a movie called Senior Moments starring William Shatner? Everyone. Old people. And they’re gonna be like, Oh, that was so sweet. She put pot in the strudel.

Crew Chief Brad: Old people are only gonna watch it when it ends up on Turner Classic Movies.

It’s still got a long ways to go before it gets there.

Steve Kondrick: All right, but now the real [01:23:00] question. Worldwide box office gross. And yes, it does have one.

Mountain Man Dan: Really? Yep. I didn’t even know this was in theaters.

Steve Kondrick: It apparently so. It was during COVID. No, no, it was released in 2021. During COVID?

Crew Chief Brad: It was the middle of COVID, yeah.

Steve Kondrick: But I guess it was shot back in 2018 because that one guy died in 2019, you were saying. So I don’t know. Okay, well there’s a worldwide gross, any guesses?

Crew Chief Eric: I’m always wrong on these. I’m gonna go high this time. 100 million dollars. No, not

Izzy Fischer: that the answer?

Crew Chief Eric: No. No. Seven and a half million.

Steve Kondrick: Tanya? Worldwide?

Worldwide.

Izzy Fischer: Now see, I am going to go. It’s also

Steve Kondrick: the same as the U. S. So don’t worry. It’s not like this premiered at Cannes

Izzy Fischer: or something. Now I was listening to something. I was listening to Hot Ones with Matt Damon.

Steve & Izzy: Matt Damon.

Izzy Fischer: He was saying something about I like

Steve & Izzy: them donuts.

Izzy Fischer: You just had to make a hundred million to even like begin to possibly be recouping.

I’m going to go with 112.

Steve Kondrick: $112 million. You think this movie made 112 million? No. No. Okay. Brad, [01:24:00] how about you?

Crew Chief Brad: What did Eric say?

Crew Chief Eric: I said seven and a half. Seven a half? Six. I’m

Crew Chief Brad: gonna go 7.51. No. Yeah, I thought about that. 7.5 and $1 Bob. Two and a half million.

Mountain Man Dan: Dan, I was thinking like 3.2. Is he

Izzy Fischer: $3.20?

Mountain Man Dan: 3.2

Crew Chief Eric: Deutch Marks. Pesos.

Izzy Fischer: I seem to remember the lowest grossing theatrical release movie of all time made 15 and had two refunds.

Steve Kondrick: Yes, that’s The Six Roads. Sorry, Catherine Heigl.

Izzy Fischer: Catherine Heigl film! So I’m gonna go 22 and one refund.

Steve Kondrick: Izzy is the closest, 41, 598.

Crew Chief Eric: No way!

Steve Kondrick: Yep. Wow. It’s under a million. Under a hundred grand.

Let’s see. Yeah. The film was released four days after William Shatner’s 90th birthday and, uh, Shatner and Lloyd appeared in Star Trek three, the search for Spock

Izzy Fischer: for Spock’s gold.

Steve Kondrick: That’s right. Search for Spock’s gold. Uh, Shatner’s character is a former NASA [01:25:00] test pilot in real life. Shatner flew into space aboard the Blue Origin spacecraft, New Shepard 4, on October 13th, 2021.

Crew Chief Eric: No, he flew aboard the USS Enterprise in 1967.

Steve Kondrick: And now the sad one, uh, final cinematic appearances of Oh, geez. Kay Ballard, who died at 93. Denise DeBari, who died at 63. And Jack Wallace, I think that’s the guy on the scooter, who died at 86. They all passed away mysteriously from January 2019 to April of 2020.

Crew Chief Eric: From boredom after watching.

Steve Kondrick: I mean, natural causes, definitely not COVID. But we’ve reached the most important part. What did we learn from Senior Moment? Anyone learn anything from this movie?

Crew Chief Eric: Well, I did, but you missed one bit of important trivia. I always have an extra little bit for you guys, right?

Steve & Izzy: Oh, what’s that?

Crew Chief Eric: Jean Smart has a laundry list of things that she’s been in, as we all know. She’s the jewel amongst all the rest of them in this movie.

Izzy Fischer: It’s [01:26:00] not Christopher Lloyd?

Crew Chief Eric: He’s a national treasure. It’s different, right? You

Crew Chief Brad: Estevez? Joe Estevez?

Crew Chief Eric: Can anyone guess what animated? series she did some voice acting on.

Steve Kondrick: Dragon Ball Z. SpongeBob SquarePants.

Mountain Man Dan: Cars. Is it from the 90s? Yes. X Men.

Steve Kondrick: Animaniacs. Gargoyles.

Izzy Fischer: Tailspin.

Mountain Man Dan: Care Bears. You guys give up?

Izzy Fischer: Batman the animated series.

Mountain Man Dan: Correct. Of course, I knew Mark Hamill did a lot in that one. Oh, who was she? Oh, Mark Hamill’s the Joker.

Crew Chief Brad: Any animated series trivia from Eric, the answer is Batman The Animated Series.

Crew Chief Eric: Yes. What role does she? She played a character named Helen. Other than that, I’d have to go back and watch to figure out who that is.

Steve Kondrick: You know what, Eric, get back to me.

Crew Chief Brad: Helen number three.

Steve Kondrick: She did a lot of

Izzy Fischer: voice acting. It was one episode. A

Steve Kondrick: lot of voice acting. She was the owner of the strudel shop in season three, The Return of the Clock King.

Crew Chief Brad: She had one line.

Steve Kondrick: He was after her cuckoo clock.

Izzy Fischer: I would bet a slow amount of money she’s probably in an episode [01:27:00] of Supernatural.

Crew Chief Eric: A slow amount of money.

Izzy Fischer: A low amount of money. I would probably bet a low amount of money on that too.

Crew Chief Eric: She’s been on everything, that’s for sure if you look at her. It was

Izzy Fischer: in a bunch of episodes of Frasier.

Crew Chief Eric: Seven, I think it was, yeah. But anyway, that’s a little bit of extra trivia for you guys. So, what did we learn?

Izzy Fischer: Well, I know what I learned. Turtles are not tortoises. The song

Crew Chief Eric: said so.

Izzy Fischer: The song did say so. A turtle’s not a tortoise. Turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle, turtle.

Steve Kondrick: I learned Helen Ventrix was Lloyd Ventrix’s ex wife.

I’m looking up to Helen in the, uh, Batman animated series now, sorry.

Izzy Fischer: You’ve got him down a Batman animated series rabbit hole, y’all.

Steve Kondrick: She was the mother of the girl that had the invisible friend mojo. Yes. You guys remember that episode? I do remember that. Yeah. So she was the mom. Oh yeah. I,

Crew Chief Brad: I totally remember that.

Be No Evil

Steve Kondrick: is the name of the episode.

Izzy Fischer: Spoiler alert. Supernatural ripped that episode off too.

Steve Kondrick: Sure. Did any other, uh, nuggets of wisdom?

Crew Chief Brad: I learned that Palm Springs is not [01:28:00] the retirement paradise. It once was

Izzy Fischer: crack dental old people,

Crew Chief Brad: and there are two cops. Sorry, I guess that was a stretch.

Crew Chief Eric: No, no. I’m processing that.

It’s a sad truth is what it is. Mm-Hmm. . I will not be retiring in Bomb Springs

Izzy Fischer: as a result of watching that movie. And then doing this episode, I learned that the I 8 is a plug in hybrid.

Steve Kondrick: Learned 90 percent of romantic comedies can be solved in the middle of the second act by just saying it. I’m trying to think of ones where that’s not the case and it’s the one where Tom Hanks is the villain.

You’ve Got Mail, where he’s like gaslighting the shit out of Meg Ryan for two hours of that movie. Like, okay, yeah, I get it. He’s just a fucking villain. But still, if one of them would just be like, hey, I’m the rival. Oh, so we can still bang though,

Mountain Man Dan: right? Undoubtedly. I think I need to take the most useful knowledge from this, but watching this movie, the one thing I learned is I want to get a bunch of friends together, go do some rascals and do some bumper cars on rascals.

Crew Chief Eric: I am with you on that. Oh my God. Let’s go to Walmart and we got this. You and I have joked about [01:29:00] this before, but that’s you and me in the. The way distant future, my man, the post office, the DMV, the old folks home.

Steve Kondrick: If it’s a private track, you don’t even need a license.

Crew Chief Eric: Anything’s a private track when you have a rascal.

So what did I learn? I learned that. I, too, could write a movie that grosses no money.

Steve Kondrick: Almost 42 grand.

Crew Chief Eric: And that Tanya thinks that a romantic comedy starring Ramses IV would be a fantastic film.

Steve Kondrick: The Mummy 4. Subtitles are all stork, tiger, sand wave.

Mountain Man Dan: There’s one more thing I learned from this. Eric is way more of a Star Trek nerd than I initially thought he was.

Steve Kondrick: Where have

Crew Chief Eric: you been?

Mountain Man Dan: Seriously?

Crew Chief Eric: We have a whole channel on

Mountain Man Dan: Discord about this. About half the channel is in there muted so I don’t have to see them.

Crew Chief Eric: Oh my god, your mind would explode about the things we theorize about Star Trek.

Mountain Man Dan: I don’t watch that stuff so this is opening my eyes.

Crew Chief Eric: I’m telling you guys, I’ve said it before, Brad says, you know, if we start another podcast, if I could start another podcast, it would be a Star Trek podcast and I [01:30:00] would call it Deep Thoughts with Gall Ducat because if a tree falls in a Bajoran in the forest, it’s a Bajoran.

Nobody’s there to hear them scream, do they make a sound?

Steve Kondrick: Except Gal Ducat, who has them all mic’d.

Izzy Fischer: Steve’s favorite character.

Crew Chief Eric: Gal Ducat is a badass. Pretty much.

Izzy Fischer: Dan’s like, I just heard words. I don’t know what you said, but there were words. They weren’t English.

Crew Chief Brad: He was speaking

Mountain Man Dan: Klingon.

Steve Kondrick: They were Cardassian.

Mountain Man Dan: That was Toddler gibberish.

Steve Kondrick: Anyway guys, thanks so much for, uh, I don’t know, joining us or we’re joining you. I’m not sure what’s going on here exactly. But, uh, thanks for watching this. Silly movie with us. Wait, do you guys also have a podcast?

Crew Chief Eric: We do. We have several of them now. So our headliner is the break fix podcast.

Now part of the motoring podcast network where you can find other shows like evening with the legend, the motoring historian, the Ferrari marketplace, and a couple others that you might be interested in. So check out motoringpodcast. net for an index of all the things that we’re into these days as we continue to grow our platform.

And we can be [01:31:00] found on social media. at GrandTouringMotorsports, G R A N O D, Touring Motorsports, or at Motoring Podcast Network.

Steve Kondrick: Eric, might I recommend the, also, Motor Boatering Podcast?

Crew Chief Eric: Next season. Next season, Steve.

Izzy Fischer: Woo!

Crew Chief Eric: And where can we find you guys?

Izzy Fischer: Oh, babe, are you on social media? I am! You can find me everywhere.

Untidy Venus, like a goddess who’s bad at housekeeping. On all the social medias, I do occasionally jump on. Steve, where can we find you?

Steve Kondrick: Oh, you can find us everywhere on all the major podcatchers on Everything I Learned From Movies, or hit us up directly on Twitter, Facebook, Patreon, and BlueSki at E I L F Movies.

That’s Everything I Learned From Movies. If

Crew Chief Brad: you like what you’ve heard and want to learn more about GTM, be sure to check us out on www. gtmotorsports. org. You can also find us on Instagram Also, if you want to get involved or have suggestions for future [01:32:00] shows, you can call or text us at 202 630 1770 or send us an email at crewchief at gtmotorsports.

org. We’d love to hear from you.

Crew Chief Eric: Hey everybody, Crew Chief Eric here. We really hope you enjoyed this episode of BreakFix, and we wanted to remind you that GTM remains a no annual fees organization, and our goal is to continue to bring you quality episodes like this one at no charge. As a loyal listener, please consider subscribing to our Patreon for bonus and behind the scenes content, extra goodies, and GTM swag.

For as little as 2 and 50 cents a month, you can keep our developers, writers, editors, casters, and other volunteers fed on their strict diet of fig Newtons, gummy bears, and monster. Consider signing up for Patreon today at www. patreon. com forward slash GT motorsports, and remember without fans, supporters, and members like you.

None of this would be [01:33:00] possible.

Skip ahead if you must… Here’s the highlights from this episode you might be most interested in and their corresponding time stamps.

• 00:00 Introduction to Grand Touring Motorsports
• 00:22 Movie Review Begins: Senior Moment
• 01:10 Introducing the Cast and Crew
• 02:05 Plot Breakdown and Key Scenes
• 03:31 Analyzing the Characters and Performances
• 05:39 Humor and Highlights
• 07:32 Driving Test and Legal Troubles
• 10:40 Romantic Subplot and Cuckoo Clock Mystery
• 14:45 Training Montage and Cuckoo Cafe
• 17:33 Final Thoughts and Observations
• 46:10 A Hilarious Third Grade Story
• 46:34 The Auction and the Tortoise Photograph
• 46:57 The Love Story of the Car
• 47:44 High on the Roof: A Senior Moment
• 48:44 Track Day at the BMW Test Track
• 53:02 The Cuckoo Clock Cafe
• 54:20 A Realistic Romance Scene
• 56:55 The Grocery Store Encounter
• 59:19 The Golf Course and Spa Mystery
• 59:59 The Big Reveal: Family Ties
• 01:08:07 The Heart Attack and the Car Chase
• 01:13:40 The Final Driving Test
• 01:15:43 The Happy Ending and the Porsche
• 01:19:16 Final Thoughts and Recommendations

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